Do men just not help with weddings?

Why did he propose to me and tell me so often that he can’t wait to marry me, if he puts in no planning on the wedding! I feel absolutely swamped like I’m sure all brides do. I have no idea where to start and I’m getting no help from him 😅

30 Answers

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  • ?
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    Historically speaking, that's just the way men are.  Go to a local bookstore and look for a book 'Planning a Wedding'.  It will walk you through all of the steps and you'll be fine.  I bought, two of these, before my daughter got married (she was living out-of-state).  I would read it - call her and to make sure she was doing what she was supposed to be doing.

  • Carrie
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    If you told him, lets just get married at a Justice of Peace, he would likely be fine. Men dont' usually care about all the wedding  woopTdoo. They are happy with the end results. Have him help address/stamp envelopes for invitations. Have him help put the wedding table favors together. Find a job for him and give to him. Simple but helpful. But don't expect him to come up with ideas or have creativity with the wedding plans. Its just not natural for many guys.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Men, in general, do not take as much effort as their brides do to plan their wedding. most men do not pay attention to details like what color napkins to choose or what ribbons to use in the center piece...if they even know what a center piece actually is!

    My fiance told me to plan everything as long as he could eat beef for his meal and that he'd be damned if he was getting married in rented clothing. He bought a nice new suit and shoes!

    I planned everything else. 

    Men want the marriage and tend to care Iess about the wedding planning details.

    It's like when we bought our house. He wanted the house but did not care about how I decorated it.

    He got what he wanted... the wife and the house and gave all the fluff no mind!

  • Kelly
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Depends on the guy really some area actively involved and others just show up at the wedding and sign their name to pay things along the way.

    My brother did more planning of the wedding than his wife did.  His wife just picked out colors, dresses and decor (& invitations), he did pretty much everything else.  He got the venue & vendor contracts, picked out the caterer & food, did his part of the guest list (and our mom reviewed it to see if he forgot anyone) and he did the seating chart too.  He likes to party plan & host and does all the planning for family reunions, birthday parties and things like that.  We swear he missed his calling as an event planner.

    My other brother signed his name to pay for things and showed up at the wedding.  His wife did everything else and my brother I mention above helped her.

    I'll be honest I'm not all that girlie and wedding planning actually didn't interest me. I cared more about being married than the wedding itself.  I would have married my guy at the courthouse but he wanted a big wedding and he was paying so that's what we had.  I picked out the dresses and my husband and I picked out the venues together, he picked out the food and my brother did everything else.

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  • ?
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    My husband didn't help much either, don't expect them to help much accept for buying their suits / tuxes, his wedding ring and discussing what wedding date you want. Men are usually clueless or they don't care (they're marrying you after all) when it comes to flowers, cakes, and what colors to pic etc. 

    I bought a planning guide that suggested I start by picking the colors / theme to my wedding. I also got some help from my family, just be sure that they don't get carried away it's your wedding. 

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

     Marriage overwhelmingly, unequally and unfairly benefits and privileges women over men, which is why weddings are always women's work, so with his last glimmer of remaining sense, he behaves accordingly.

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

     (Wo)men are all different and don't operate the same zxjq

     . . . . . . . . . .

    🔳🔳🔳🔳🔳🔳🔳🔳🔳🔳

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    And when you asked him if he would like to help or if he would prefer you hire help, how did he respond?   Does he even WANT a complicated wedding that requires this much work?

    Communication.   It's a skill we married people find helpful.

  • drip
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    No. My daughter and her husband discussed everything and they each had lists for stuff to get done. All of her friends were the same, sharing all of   the To Do list.  They got married six years ago. 

    This will just keep on once married. Sit down and really explain this is OUR wedding and we both need to plan and run the errands, and get stuff done. Not just me. And then  stop doing things. Where are we getting married, I don’t know you don’t want to go looking at venues with me. Either we do this as a team or we don’t do it.  Is he fine with going down to the courthouse. Are you? You got to get on the same page. 

    Darkvelvetrain is living in the 1950’s.

  • 2 months ago

    Weddings are 100% for the women.  What satisfaction do you think he gets out of planning the thing you want to do and he probably does not?  If you don't believe me, pretend you just want to go to the courthouse and not have a wedding.  He'd probably be ecstatic.

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