Why do people get degrees, then become stay at home parents later on in life?

It's vexing how society pushes high school seniors to attend college/establish a good career (which is a good thing)--but then nobody says anything when a woman is 30+ and not in a career position. Last time I checked, you can't support yourself (or a family) off working part-time.

It's like they're saying it's bad to be financially dependent on your parents, but it's okay to be financially dependent on your spouse. Why is this? Why do people settle for working low wage jobs after college?

15 Answers

  • MS
    Lv 7
    1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    When people start having families, plans may have to change.  That may have been the plan all along.  Not everyone who attends college wants to devote their life to their career.  Attending college may have allowed them to begin a career, start saving money, get themselves established, and have something to use again and fall back on later.  Having children changes the picture.  For many people it's important to have a parent home, for a number of reasons.  In many cases, it makes more financial sense given the high cost of childcare.  For some families, it's necessary because of special needs that the children may have.  Not all jobs lend themselves well to child-rearing, and so some parents (usually mothers, sometimes fathers) take a break from their careers to raise their children.  Many rejoin the workforce when their kids are in school or after they have moved out of the house. Others are content to work part-time or not at all.  It is generally the case that the family is supporting itself just fine on one income, and there is nothing wrong with that if that is mutual arrangement that works best for the family.

  • 1 month ago

    Women working is a VERY new thing with people alive today remembering a time when women just didn't do it.  Having at least one stay at home parent (traditionally a woman) was the norm for thousands of years.  I think a better question is how in two or three generations we went from that system to a system that expects women to work.  

    Last time I checked, there are plenty of part-time positions that help you support a family ESPECIALLY if you are educated.  I work as a part-time lecturer making $103,000 a year from university teaching (I physically only teach 21 hours of classes).  The rest of my income is from my businesses.  It would be easy for me to be a stay at home parent if I wanted to be, and I could certainly support my girlfriend (I suppose she would be my wife at that point) to stay and raise the kids so they too have a better shot at becoming educated and successful.

  • zipper
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Because after the kids are gone they can move back into the world away from you! Besides to many people think that they can not take the education away from you: boy are they in for a shocker!

  • F
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    I graduated from one if the best universities in the world and worked for 20 years. I was then made redundant ( my job was exported to China) while my wife had just returned to work part time after a baby. It made sense  for her to go full time and for me to stay at home. We were in a fortunate position that she was in a decent well paid job.

    My parents thought it was terrible and said I was wasting my education. However they are very old fashioned and think it’s wrong for women to work. My wife has a degree too but they still think she should gavd stayed at home.

    It suited us fine.

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  • 1 month ago

    A university or college education is about more than finding a high-paying job. It's about expanding your mental capacity and mental horizons, so that in later life, whatever you do, you can draw on the rich resources of your well-nourished brain. A well-educated mother can offer more to her children than even the very best but poorly-educated mother.

  • 1 month ago

    When i was in the Military i did More courses that i have never used it is all about education the More the Better

    one of my Favourite Courses was Occupational Health and Safety

    I would never have believed people could be so stupid No wonder People are Dying from Covid 19

    people are still not washing their hands when leaving Public toilets

  • Expat
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    My guess is you’re talking about housewives. Look, bottom line, people tend to marry people with similar educational backgrounds, so people with college degrees tend to marry people with degrees. It’s that simple. 

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    The first thing you are doing is saying that a mother raising her babies full time is not worthwhile and that just dumping them off in a day care AND PAYING FOR THE DAY CARE is somehow better. If you dump your kid in any kind of other care it costs money out of your pay packet and sometimes families find it's more cost effective not to spend money on the other care. Putting your kid in day care and having a job doesn't magically mean you have more money because the care is expensive. 

    Why do they settle for low wages? Uh because that's often all that's offered. Most first world countries these days are flooding masses of people in from the third world to keep wages and salaries low for big business AND for government jobs. In my country New Zealand they switched from giving internships for government jobs to students coming out of university to just never giving the people coming out of university a chance because there's always someone from overseas with "experience" that you can bring in to do the job for bottom dollar because they're so desperate to get out of their own country. So I have a masters degree ended up being a stay at home mother and never had a good full time job in my entire life. 

    They also did the same thing  with apprenticeships for all the tradesmen cut all the apprenticeships so the government didn't have to pay for them and just FLOOD people in from the third world who have the skills and have them work at bottom dollar. That screwed over my husband when he was young. So he had no job and I had a 3 day a week retail job when we met. I finished my masters degree and the only job I could get after extensive applications was a three day a week retail job. He eventually got a buyers job with a company where he worked for 12 years until everyone was laid off in the recession. I managed to get some work teaching English as a second language to some of the people the government kept endlessly flooding in in massive numbers. 

    You may not have met the real world yet. 

  • John
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    Your message bounces from stay at home parents, to not in a career position, to working part-time, to low wage jobs. When posting, more thought and less rant is in order. 

  • y
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Plans change, emotions changed, what one wants in life changes.  That is why so many get a degree and then end up staying home, their viewpoints changed. Nothing wrong with that either. I believe at home with a good parent is still the best way to raise a child.

  • 1 month ago

    If the family is surviving on one income, what does it matter to you?  If one of the spouses elects to stay at home, that is their choice.  As long as the family is being supported and they are not on welfare, etc.  

    Why get an education and then stay at home?  That one is easy.  You do not know if your spouse could die, become injured, leave you, etc.  You want the education to fall back on if you need it.  Because you are right that you can not leave on a part time minimum wage job.

    Funny that staying at home, raising the children, and taking care of the home use to be considered a virtue.  What happened in our society that caring for your family is now considered a crime?

    Maybe people need to keep their noses out of other people's families.  As long as they are happy with the arrangement and are not leaving off welfare or something, why does it matter to you?

    If you think that working is more important that caring for your family, that is your opinion and you have a right to have it.  But do not look down on people who have a different opinion and are not harming you in any way. 

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