San
Lv 5

Which sentence is correct?

A. He adjusted the tinder, angled the lens to face the sun, and smoke began to rise.

B. He adjusted the tinder and angled the lens to face the sun, and smoke began to rise.

Thanks!

5 Answers

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  • 4 weeks ago
    Favourite answer

    The second is right.

    The first one is a comma list of things he did.  He adjusted the tinder and angled the lens.  But 'smoke began to rise' was not something he did.  He did one thing, and another thing, and then something else happened. 

  • 4 weeks ago

    The second is correct.

    The first says "he" adjusted, 'he' angled, and ... Which leads the reader to suppose that 'he' is also the subject of the third verb. But he isn't: the subject of "began" is "smoke".

    In the second it's clear that 'he' adjusted AND he 'angled', then a different subject 'began'. 

  • John P
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    You might find both forms in normal everyday British English.

    BUT - 'tinder' is a very old-fashioned word, and not everybody would understand it, though they might work out its meaning from context.  

    Maybe: "He adjusted the pile of dry grass, angled....." Or was it: "He adjusted the wood shavings, angled....."?  For a fire in a grate or a wood-burning stove indoors, we use old newspaper and 'kindling (wood)' to get the fire going. Presumably the scene is outdoors, since he is using a magnifying glass.  Possibly even use 'magnifying glass' rather than 'lens'?

    Almost certainly, in 74 years in Britain and Australia, I have never heard anybody say 'tinder' in everyday speech. It was one of those words one came across in old books. One then asked the teacher: "What is tinder?"

    Maybe 'tinder' is in use in the USA.   Await answers from Americans.

  • 4 weeks ago

    B. is better, but it would be better as two separate sentences:

    He adjusted the tinder and angled the lens to face the sun. Smoke began to rise.

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  • 4 weeks ago

    A. you need a comma between a list of things.

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