Anonymous asked in HealthMental Health · 4 weeks ago

I can’t get close to anyone... help ?

can someone pls tell me why I’m incapable of getting close to anyone.... like I’m so horrified of letting anyone know the hard things about me so I just keep it all to myself. Yet this doesn’t even help me... I feel isolated and lonely and it’s making me not want to live anymore. even if someone is close to me and claims they like me my wall never comes down. Now every time I’m in an uncomfortable situation I start scratching at my skin till I bleed. Usually just the back of my hands or the ankle, and it’s only when I’m with other ppl. 

Im embarrassed to like someone, yet I want to like someone so bad. It’s literally torture. 

I just need someone to depend on, I always have the opportunity yet I always stop myself. 

Anyone else like this? 

How do I make it stop? 

Im worried that one day I’ll go to far and really harm myself. 

3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    It's okay to have not many people around or involved in your life. I have zero friends but I do have a husband and kids but I personally dislike people... I distrust people and hate socializing I'm a introvert, and for many years I thought I was different, abnormal, something was wrong with me...but there's nothing  wrong with being different . If you really want to be social that's your choice just be you, and don't feel pressured into what society thinks is "normal".

  • 4 weeks ago

    Well...these are thoughts and emotions that are clearly distressing you, which shouldn't be happening.  In principle, no one should be distressed by what's going on inside them, beyond performance anxiety, disappointment, or grieving.

    The fact that you're damaging your skin suggests that you could do with some intervention on the part of a trained professional counselor - you should look into that, or discuss the possibility of finding a counselor with your parents.

    At the outset, it appears that you are suffering from fear of being discovered for who you believe yourself to truly be, and you're sure this "real" you will be a disappointment to others, and you will then feel justly rejected and scorned, thus confirming your worst fears about yourself.  That could feel very, very real to you.

    Nonetheless, regardless of how real it feels, it's all baloney.  But you aren't very likely to take my word for it.  That's why it's worth your while to find a counselor you can trust.

    BTW - this sort of thing isn't unusual among teens and even young twenty-somethings.  It's more a result of how young people's brains go about growing, than it is anything specific to YOU, dear.  You can overcome this, and it'll be like it never happened.

    Best of luck.

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    Never put yourself into a situation where you have to depend on anyone else because that makes you vulnerable. Only show people what you want them to see and keep the rest private.  

    Scratch your scalp under your hair so you don't have any marks showing. Some of us are just this way; it's life. Btw I have always had a social life full of acquaintances and friends and long term relationships. But nobody knows what I've been through and that's okay. That's a private part of me. It's easy to separate private and public you, and go on living life as a popular person loving your public identity. At the end of the day we all have skeletons in our closets.

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