Do you think there is part of me that is lesbian?

I am a girl and when I was a child, I felt what was like true love with a neighbor I was friends with. I felt immense love (romantic love), not platonic. I also had interpersonal trauma when I was young. I'd get jealous when she moved away and made new friends. When I was young I told her I wanted to marry her and told my mom I loved her. My mom did not think I was a lesbian, but just an intense emotional child. I am 30 years old now. And I have not seen her in 13 years. However, even hearing she moved in with a guy elicits some type of reaction in me. Growing up I always wondered and felt an identity in being gay. However, It was never sexual attraction, more like a love like attachment that I can feel very strongly to this day. However, when I was 4 or 5, I developed a crush on a cute boy in my class. In that situation, it was an attraction (like sexual attraction so to speak rather than romantic). I am 30 now and very much attracted to men and have always had a sexual attraction toward men. Never women. Do you think I actually romantically loved that girl growing up, or it was some weird bond/attachment with her maybe due to interpersonal trauma I faced around the time I knew her. It genuinely felt strongly romantic, and I was always very jealous whenever she had new friends and felt abandoned and depressed.

Update:

*It's important to add that I no longer identify as gay and do not experience romantic feelings towards women, however, feel this was a unique experience and wondering what you think it may have stemmed from

2 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    3 months ago

    Hitler's homosexual partner was Heydrich.

    Homosexuals are not Christian; they're free-masons.

    Lenin's homosexual partner was Zinoviev (but alsoBronstein ... once).

    All these leaders (Hitler, Churchill, Stalin, Roosevelt) had Jewish blood in them and engaged in debauchery

    According to Grigoriy Klimov,three stages of degeneracy are

    1)sodomy (anal, oral, masturbation, pedophilia, incest, etc.)

    2)insane asylum

    3)physical deformities in children (horse foot, rabbit lip, wolf jaw, different length limbs, etc.)

    Homosexual Lenin was put into an insane asylum and didn't have kids even though he was married to Krupskaya.

    Degenerates are usually aggressive and end up in jail.

    Jail doesn't make you gay. Gays go to prison because they're super aggressive.

    Degenerates are usually told to become monks but Judaism doesn't have monkhood. So, these aggressive degenerates tend to become politicians.

    Karl Marx forked Engels

    In hell, 4 biggest sinners are (in this order)

    1)Marx

    2)Engels

    3)Lenin

    4)Stalin'

    Lenin had syphilis. His brains were the size of a walnut. Why? Because degenerates drink vodka and experiment with drugs.

    According to Saint Prophet Healer VyacheslavKrasheninnikov, vodka dries up one's brains; forgive me

    Source(s): burn your documents and electronics (so that you won't be tracked... even old broken unplugged 1970 TV set will show the antichrist). Hide within a 10-15 people group (saint Gabriel Urgebadze and saint Seraphim of Sarov) in order to escape mark of the beast. If you reject mark of the beast, then your direct ancestors go to heaven (saint Vyacheslav Krasheninnikov); forgive me.
  • Anonymous
    5 months ago

    Speaking as a panromantic grey asexual person, who's got a romantic orientation that does NOT match her sexual orientation..? I know that's something that seems MUCH more common among asexuals. But it DOES also occasionally apply to some people that are not asexual! That their romantic orientation could somewhat differ from their sexual orientation! As any romantic asexual would obviously know from their own lived experience..? Being romantically in love with someone does NOT automatically mean you're sexually attracted to them! Probably it means that for MOST people. But certainly not for everyone! And even normally sexual people, whose sexual and romantic orientations DO perfectly align..? Can often remember having what they would refer to as an "innocent childhood crush", that was ALL about romantic attraction, with no sexual attraction! As their sexual drives and instincts had not developed yet. Which, for romantic asexual people..? It just stayed that way! And sexual attraction simply never entered the picture!

    Anyway... Could be that you have totally changed since childhood, and it was indeed just a passing phase, or a once-in-a-lifetime "innocent puppy love" thing. In which case, that's perfectly fine. People be different, right? But.. you may at least sincerely want to consider: could you be a biromantic heterosexual? It is possible to be that, and your feelings are perfectly valid, if you are! But.. you may still want to only be with men, as partners. Especially if sex, and sexual attraction, are important parts of a romantic relationship, for you. Like indeed they seem to be for MOST sexual people.

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