Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 month ago

My wife is never in the mood for sex?

At first when we were dating I thought she wanted to save herself for marriage, we got married last week, she still isn’t in the mood for sex

All she wants to do is sit and cuddle all day long

Is this normal??

She’s 25 I’m 28 and we still haven’t sealed the deal, we dated for 3 years before I proposed 

Now that we’re married, I just can’t take it anymore, people have needs! And I don’t want to be the kind of husband to look else where for sex

48 Answers

  • KTJoe
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Hubby dress up like a sexy woman heels, blonde wig the whole look than dance around. Watch wife's reaction...LOL

  • 1 month ago

    Someone else is poking her...

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Most reasonable men don't need to be told or reminded that 'Sex' isn't the "Most Important" thing in a relationship or Marriage,,

    But who's kidding who!?

    In Nature,,Human-Nature not withstanding, there's a reason boys & girls, Men & Women, Males & females and such like are called the opposite "Sex".

    And as long as you've politely let her get away with maintaining your relationship as if 'Sex' has little or nothing to do with the motivation for either of the two opposites to even Want to have anything to do with eachother , let-alone get Married then it appears that you got conned into buying a really cheap bill of goods.

    And adding insult to injury, without any prenuptial consummation or even the satisfaction of dating on intimate enough terms to let you know her feelings about it, much less her intentions once you were properly Married, it would also appear that you got Mind-fu#ked & conned by a classic diabolically manipulative borderline narcissistic personality disorder into becoming  the punchline of a joke she took a long time to play on you and actually Trick you into getting what you payed for without as much as a test-drive or a pop-quiz that would give you even a clue into what you may be signing on for with her!

    That's right Homey! You got Mind-fu#ked & Conned from the jump, since just because it wasn't an issue 'Before' you were married, that doesn't mean that it isn't damned-well SUPPOSED to be an issue now that you 'Are'.

    Witch puts you WELL within your right to have something to say to her about it and at this point under NO obligation to even bother being Polite about it, since only Morons think that sex within the sanctified respectibility of Marriage isn't Definitely 'Important' enough for somebody to notice when it's Not happening at all!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Hellooooo! Grownup stuff! "FACT of Life" far removed from birds & bees & cabbage leaves, Married people have sex,,and Newlywed Married People have sex ALLOT! 

    AND,,It doesn't even matter what her reasons or excuses are,,

    Abused as a child & has issues,,                                                                                                     A genuine virgin & really really nervous about it?

    Maybe she's even a closet LGBT girl on the down-low,,

    Or maybe she just never grew-up & still thinks 'Sex' is too gross of an undertaking,,

    WTF-Ever! As long as she married you with the delusion that it was gonna somehow be a sexless or even a Nearly-sexless marriage, THAT was a piece of information she damned-well Should've clued you in on sometime BEFORE the frkn Wedding & with such a deliberate deception she might as well have avoided mentioning throughout your relationship that she wasn't born entirely Female!

    The good news is, Non-consummation of a marriage or sexual incompatibility within six months to a year after Marriage is Still grounds for an Annulment in most jurisdictions witch in effect releases you from any economic liability.

    Up to you Man, but based on my own personal experience and what I know of other similar experiences,  as long as she's holding out through what would for all intent & purpose be referred to as the Honeymoon-days & nights, even if you're able smooz her into grudgingly going through with a little sex once in a while, it's unrealistic to even bother hoping against hopelessness that she'll eventually 'turn on' & just change the way she is.                                     And you can even More realistically expect her to 'Turn on You' and just as diabolically & deliberately diminish your dignity by making your marriage into non-stop childish game of loophole negotiations leading mostly to nothing but under-rewarded patience & mind numbingly exhausting exorcises in Frustration! 


  • 1 month ago

    Chances are that she will not have sex with you just because. She needs to feel something emotional to get in the mood for sex. She most likely does not feel confident about her body (extremely common in women) or has doubts about her ability to have sex. Use your creativity for that. Maybe get her flowers and a card, where you write something that communicates about sex e.g. "for my sexy wife"

    Also, explore this issue about sex with her. Don't shift the blame on her--- just present your findings and ask her if she has anything to comment on that. if she'll draw a blank here, then you can tell about going elsewhere for sex.

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  • 1 month ago

    When I was much younger, I had a girlfriend like her. She told me she was saving herself for marriage although we cuddled and necked furiously. I gave her an engagement ring and we continued cuddling and necking. She refused to set a date and, after 6 months, we broke up. That was by far, the best thing that could have happened.  If I were you, I'd explain the facts of life to her once and, if it doesn't get you anywhere, get an annulment. Good luck.

  • 1 month ago

    Are you 100% sure she's a chick ?

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Why didn't you discuss this with her before marrying? Sexual compatibility is important in a relationship.

    So much for people saying "There's more to relationships than sex."

  • 1 month ago

    You were a dumb sucker.. SHE just wanted a PAYCHECK and BILLS PAID FOR HER.. GET a  D_I_V_O_R_C_E  before you have kids and really have to pay for the next 20 years.. 


    Better to get rid of her now than later when it will cost you more.. She will eventually be having sex and not telling you either with another guy or her best female friend as she will think she has you around her finger.. GET OUT NOW...

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Someone else posted this exact same circumstance CONSTANTLY, including the word "cuddle."

    What would I do? I'd admit I made a mistake and file for an annulment based on the marriage not being consumated.

  • 1 month ago

    It does seem surprising that in three years you have never discussed sex! What she enjoys; her first orgasm; her views on porn...... 

    If this is genuine, learn to seduce her. Learn some massage techniques, for example. Find some books about the topic. Learn some techniques and tips. While you are cuddling caress her face, massage her ears and neck gently. I hope it will be much more about making love than "having sex".

    Good Luck!

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