Anonymous asked in Society & CultureEtiquette · 2 months ago

What is the most appropriate sleeping arrangement? ?

I recently moved into my own apartment here in the city and a lady friend of mine is now spending the night, albeit somewhat unexpectedly. 

She and are both recovering from anorexia and have stayed in touch even after treatment. I have told her she can always talk to me if she is having a difficult time and my door is always open to her. She has also been a great support. 

Anyhow, she is now here and just went to bed, as she was feeling quite tired. I only have one bed in my apartment, so when I go to bed in a few minutes, I may feel a bit awkward: on the one hand, I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable by simply climbing into bed with her, but on the other, it may be more awkward and make her feel guilty if she wakes up in the morning to find I slept on the couch instead of in my own bed. 

I know this is an odd question and it is indeed my own place, but I don't want to make her uncomfortable. Do I sleep in my own bed (with her) or on my couch? 

7 Answers

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    maybe you should get an airbed or have one of you's sleep on the couch

  • 1 month ago

    I'm inclined to think you're trolling.

    But just on the off chance that this is true, obviously you don't just get into bed beside her unless you both agreed on that in advance. I can't imagine how you didn't have that conversation.

    No: you find yourself a blanket and sleep on the couch. No question. It doesn't matter if she "feels guilty" - maybe it'll force her to make her own arrangements for sleeping somewhere else tomorrow night.

  • 1 month ago

    buy a blow up mattress for $15 - suggest she may be more comfortable on that.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Of course you sleep on the couch.  Don't crawl into bed with her, for goodness sakes.

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    It's bizarre that you didn't discuss this before she fell asleep. Unless she's made it clear that she has romantic intentions toward you it would be best for you to crash on the couch, floor or wherever and then discuss future sleeping arrangements tomorrow. 

  • g
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    You talk to your friend about it and decide between you.

  • 2 months ago

    There is no one golden rule here, and ultimately comes down to your comfort level and that of your guest.  It is not uncommon for friends/family to share a bed if necessary and if you do not want this woman in your bed, offer her the sofa.

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