Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 month ago

How do I deal with the fact that my husband used to be in a serious relationship with my brother's wife?

Long story short, my brother left the US for 3 years and went to South America because he just needed sometime on his own. He went to Brazil, quickly feel in love and married a woman from there. He brought her to the US and due to the situation this was the first time I even saw her, heard her voice etc. My brother wanted limited contact with everyone while in S.America and so I only talked to him through the phone once a month. He and his wife have been in the US since last Sept 2019 but we have been too busy to visit each other until last weekend when the whole family came over to stay with me, my husband and kids. 

When they had arrived he told me he was going to drop his wife off first because he needed to sort some things out. I went over to his car window to greet him and his wife came out and she was stunningly beautiful, it was intimidating. My kids were even gobsmacked at how beautiful someone can be. My husband came out the door and she said 'Jason?!' he said 'Adriana! Adriana came into my home and couldn't take her eyes off my husband and neither could he take his eyes off her. She then gave him a hug and sat right beside him and began talking to him in Portuguese because she had taught him. W/out even asking I had learned about their past. I can't get over it. He was engaged to Adriana and she broke it off because of another American man but he ended it with her and tried to get my husband but he had moved back to the US & now she's w/ my brother.

3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Once upon a time my husband was stationed in Spain and met a woman who was so beautiful that I was intimidated and then I found out that his brother had met her when he was vacationing in Spain.  Couldn't believe his brother never saw a photo, never put the names together, was so shocked to see her.

    That is sort of the same situation.  This is why I INSIST on seeing photographs of the people my family members date.  I don't want this to happen again.

  • Happy
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    how can you blame him?  she is beautiful, i suppose

  • keerok
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    It's normal for people to reconnect. This situation only becomes a problem if you're not confident enough about your relationship with your husband. 

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