Is it a good idea to buy a house with your boyfriend or girlfriend? Why or why not?
It’s been a month since I’ve asked this question, and I did NOT buy a house with him. I’m very glad I made that decision because he started talking about wanting to move out of state.
- Anonymous4 months agoFavourite answer
A friend bought a house with his girlfriend. They had both been married before and were supposed to get married to each other when they purchased the house. They had already been together for two years. They bought at pretty much the height of the market. Unfortunately they bought something they could only barely afford if both of them continued to earn what they were making at the time. Life isn't always fair though. People lose jobs and never make as much as they made before and people become disabled and end up not being able to contribute. When they broke up, she very fortunately continued to pay her share since it was in both their names but they ended up selling for a loss and it took them almost a year after they broke up to sell which prevented either of them from being able to get settled into new lives. So consider what would happen if you broke up. Who would stay? Would the other pay their share of the mortgage and upkeep? Would the person that stayed pay rent to to the other person? Could one afford to buy the other out? Is there a way to split the house into two apartments if it came to that so that you could each live in one unit? Do you already live together and get along well? How do you divide housework/chores/yardwork/car maintenance now? Do you think you would still be civil and friendly in a breakup? It could just be very messy in a break up. In a divorce you have the same situation but you have slightly more equitable protection when a court is overseeing the dissolution of a partnership.
- Emily RoseLv 63 months ago
If you plan on getting married and have been together for at least three years then it's not a bad idea BUT that's if you're only 100 percent sure that's what you want. But if it's not and you haven't been together for a long time then just give it more time. Don't ever rush into a huge investment with someone that you don't plan on spending your life with.
- Anonymous4 months ago
Absolutely NOT. I've known two people who were really good friends for YEARS and bought a house together. One of the women had her (painter) brother do so much (unpaid) work renovating the place - for his sister. The the other girl's (married!) boyfriend spat the dummy and so they sold the house. (All that work . . . ) Personally, I bought a house with one of my kids. A very close relationship where we ALWAYS got along really well. Until she found a new friend, who was jealous of what we had and started harping about the 'cost' and bad mouthing me. Three years down the track, we sold the house - I just couldn't take the abuse anymore. The point is - while you 'think' you 'know' the person - you don't know how that person (or any person for that matter!) will be years down the way . . .
- KTJoeLv 74 months ago
Not a good idea one is always between jobs, deep in debt, has poor money handling habits. The Boyf or Girlf with a stable job, nice credit history should be the mortgage holder.
- What do you think of the answers? You can sign in to give your opinion on the answer.
- Anonymous4 months ago
no , as matter fact you should not buy a house with your wife or husband
but if you get a good lawyer to write a prenup agreement even if you are not married ,, it will be as good as or better than married
are both people paying equal amounts on the down payment , monthly payment and upkeep and living expense ?
one of the two should buy and pay all cost the other should rent from the owner
but eventual disagreement on what when and where will destroy the value of ownership unless it is already agreed who walks away with nothing
- 4 months ago
It depends. If you have gf and you bought a house that you decided for her to lived with you in it, then you can have the opportunity to kick her out if anything destructive happens between you and her. But if she pays for the house and has you living in it, then your *** is grass.
- dale_jdcLv 64 months ago
If you're paying cash for the home, ok. It's easy to split if you all break-up. If you are considering a joint mortgage......absolutely not without being married. The legalities of it are way too complicated for unmarried couples that break-up and both still have payment obligations.
- PLv 74 months ago
You just have to know what you are getting into. You are essentially taking a huge joint commitment without taking any vows, so you really need to ask yourself if you BOTH can see yourself saying together forever and fully make that commitment since it will get extremely messy if you break up. People think that by avoiding getting married they can avoid a messy divorce, but the reality is it's not the marriage certificate that causes the legal issues, it's the house, bank accounts, and kids that cause the mess in court. You may think "what is the big deal, I can just sell it". The problem is breakups are usually not very friendly. All it takes is one person who doesn't want to sell, doesn't have the finances or desire to get a bank refinance the house in their name only and pay off their ex. It's much easier to tell their ex to just go away and then stay in the house. Meanwhile you won't ever be able to buy a new house yourself until you take your ex to court. You may even be forced to pay for a mortgage on a house you no longer live in by the bank.
The takeaway point is when you buy a house with someone you are entering a huge legal commitment with them that is very difficult to get out of and can have lasting effects for many years to come if something doesn't work out. If just one of you isn't really ready for that level of commitment because they are too distracted with the dream of owning a house it creates a big problem.
- Christin KLv 74 months ago
It is never a good idea to spend so much money on something you may not have legal entitlement to later. It's like taking money and simply burning it. If you do this, you need to have a legal, written agreement about what happens to the house and the money you invested BEFORE you sign that mortgage agreement. That's how you protect yourself from being shut out or skunked later. Go see an attorney.
- Alan HLv 74 months ago
Unless you are totally committed, that is foolish.
If you are totally committed why not get married?
- 4 months ago
I don't think it's a good idea because moving in too late or too early with a partner could be a great disaster. Unless that person is planning a Future with their partner then it is Okay I assume.