has anyone ever taken their spouse back after experiencing abuse?

Can a relationship be restored after being punched, choked and spit on by your spouse

7 Answers

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  • Trish
    Lv 5
    3 weeks ago

    No, the relationship cannot be restored.  Once he started verbally abusing you it was over... because the verbal abuse usually starts before the physical abuse.  A lot of women go back because they developed low self-esteem while being abused.  I experienced it on some level.  When the abuse first started I knew it was all him but after a while I began to think it was partly my fault when it was all him the entire time.  

    Don't ever go back to an abuser if you still want to have a relationship get to know someone else.  I honestly don't know what to do but I am 55 now and men don't approach me anymore so I don't have to worry about it.  I shouldn't say that there is one man but it's a long distance thing which is difficult.   And I didn't meet him online and we Love each other.  You can find Love again.

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  • Ocimom
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    NO.  Do not go back to the abuse.  It will be worse then the first time around.

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  • 1 month ago

    No, it can't.  In fact, abuse always escalates. 

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  • 1 month ago

    Those are two VERY different questions.  

    1. Sadly, tens of thousands of women take back abusive spouses and partners who continue a cycle of physical and psychological abuse. 

    2. Restoration can, in theory, happen if the abuser get long term professional help and gots through a true transformation BEFORE returning to the spouse.  A person needs to go through the process of repentance, reform, restitution, etc. to prove a change.  Just saying "I'm sorry" isn't enough

    Abusers rarely see themselves as  the problem or are willing to do the deep work to address the reason they lash out and to develop the tools to deal with conflict calmly and rationally.  

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  • If it's abusive, NO. Thankfully no man has ever done that to me, and hopefully a man never will. They would be out the door so fast it would make their head spin. I would not take them back. 

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    if that punching and choking isn't mutual, then obviously you need to uh find another guy that respects you and doesn't want to kill you

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    People who take back an abusive spouse end up dead.

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