Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsWeddings · 4 months ago

Will it be wrong of me and the rest of the family not to attend my sister's wedding?

My sister got engaged sometime around mothers day.  She's marrying a jackass.  Her kids do not like him and they have no connection what so ever, unless he's buying them something. He never takes them anywhere to bond and he doesn't want them in the house, unless to put on a facade, so they don't live with them.  

She told me and my mom that my niece played a part in the engagement, but my niece told us that she had no part in it what so ever.  Instead her bestfriend's daughter played a major role with showing her the ring while my niece stood in the background and watched.  My mom, myself, and my sister's other two children were not invited to the engagement.

She made her best friend her maid of honor, instead of me, her only sister. Instead of telling me, she texted my mom.  My mom never responded to her, so now she's telling everyone in the family that she's jealous of her and a bunch of other lies.  Her best friend keeps making posts about the maid of honor dress that she wants and tags me in them to rub it in my face.  The entire situation is disturbing,  None of the family wants to attend her wedding.

10 Answers

  • 4 months ago

    While you say the man is a jackass, you provide very little detail about how you arrived at that conclusion.

    If your sister is willing to abandon her kids because BF doesn't care for them, that's a deficit in HER character.  Many children don't like Mom's or Dad's new partner, because it makes them feel as if a parent is being replaced or just plain jealousy about not having the parent undivided attention. That's an issue for parents to take up with the children. That the children like BF when he buys them toys is indicative of the shallowness their mother has imbued in them, not a character flaw in BF.

    I'm guessing you're talking about an "engagement party" since most of the engagements I'm familiar with happen privately. Since you don't care for fiance, I guess Sis figured you wouldn't come anyway. As for the whole issue of the niece, WTH are you talking about? Who cares what children do at a party, as long as they behave?

    No one is entitled to a place in the wedding party. You've been spared the expense of buying a dress and shoes you'll never wear again, I don't see the problem there. You don't approve of the wedding, so why WOULD you stand with her, anyway? And you're all b-tthurt about not being a bridesmaid for a sister you don't like at a wedding your don't approve of. 

    The most disturbing thing about this post is the pettiness of everyone involved.

  • 4 months ago

    Wrong is a moral judgement.  It would be unkind and unsupportive, and will probably cause a deep rift in your family. That said, a wedding invitation is not a legal summons.  No one should attend a wedding they don't want to attend or one where they do not believe the couple should marry.

    I'd suggest everyone in your family grow up and simmer down a bit. Your sister is a grown woman.  Why on earth should you, your mother, your siblings or any of your children be involved in a personal and private moment between two adults? I don't know anyone who invited a whole group of people to an engagement.  

  • Trish
    Lv 5
    4 months ago

    The entire family has no say so in her affairs or nuptials.  If the family doesn't have cause to attend they shouldn't but it's a good opportunity to meet the other family.

  • 4 months ago

    it will be wrong.  you support family always

    what if she does divorce.  you them going to throw her a party?

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  • 4 months ago

    The answer to your question is no. What a mess your family is.

  • 4 months ago

    You all sound like such self involved, petty, back-stabbing whiners, so I'd say you could do whatever you want about the wedding and it would be totally within the norm for you.

  • Anonymous
    4 months ago

    if you weren't invited to the engagement, then uninvite yourself from the wedding. no need for you to go when you clearly don't support them (not saying you're wrong, just try to minimize the drama)

  • drip
    Lv 7
    4 months ago

    It is an invitation  not a summons.   If you don’t want to go, don’t go. 

    Do not attend if you will just be complaining and miserable  the whole time. 

    Why are you so upset about not being the MOH if you don’t even want to attend the wedding?

  • 4 months ago

    if u do not want to attend the wedding -  do not attend the wedding. your sister's behaviour does not mean she is unhappy and shouldn't marry and who are u to decide whether her fiancé is a jackass or not? she decides how to live her life, u either come and be at her wedding or do not come, it wouldn't matter for anyone, especially for her, as u call him jackass, fiancé.

  • Anonymous
    4 months ago

    Very wrong, unless it is a civil ceremony.

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