Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsWeddings · 1 month ago

What should I do in order to help my girlfriend who is being mistreated at home?

Her parents died when she was a child and she's been living with some relatives, the point is that they hate her. They costantly pick on her, make her cook, let her shower for no more than 10 minutes counted as not to waste hot water (but their american grooms can shower as much as they want and many times a week), she has to play with their children and babysit them when they go out, she shares a room with two other cousins who hate her and call her names cause she doesn't go clubbing and she is a quiet girl. She told me she is tiring of living there and wants to go away and never look back, also added that she feels no affection for them nor their children, because they have been treating like this since she was a child. They don't even want us to meet, her male cousins threathen to beat me up if I dare to talk to her. Now I'm more than sure to take her to my own place, the only problem is that she is 17, I am 21, she cannot wait no longer.

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  • Edna
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If her relatives are her legal guardians (which they probably are, if she's been living with them since her parents passed away when she was a young child), she's going to HAVE to wait until she's at least 18 before you can take her into your own home, and  before she can move out of her relatives' home.

    Let's see: She tells you that her relatives make her cook, let her shower for no more than 10 minutes at a time because they don't want her to use up all the hot water, make her play with their children and babysit them when they go out, and she has to share a room with two cousins who call her names.  

    Oh, my!  The poor little thing is REALLY being badly abused, isn't she?  

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  • Trish
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    You have to wait until she is eighteen years of age then you can marry her and move her into your home 🏡 together.

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  • drip
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    She can call social services. Let them know she is being mentally abused.  

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  • Tj
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    What is legal age in your state? She may be able to move with you, find a lawyer to see if there is a way to get her out of there. She can also go for emancipation.

    • Edna
      Lv 7
      1 month agoReport

      She can't go for emancipation; not unless she can prove to the Court that she has income that will allow her to live on her own & provide for all her housing, food, clothing transportation & medical expenses. The Court will NOT consider living with her boyfriend as reason to grant emancipation. 

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  • 1 month ago

    These spiteful guardians will get you in trouble if you don’t wait until she’s 18. It’s not that much longer.

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  • 1 month ago

    All you can do now is to support her, emotionally speaking. 

    You have zero authority. 

    In some places, a person of 16 or 17 can legally run away.

    In some places  if a 21 year old has sex with someone under 18, they can be arrested for statutory rape and be stuck with being a sex offender and have to register as one. So you had better mind the law.

    Chances are that the family she is with is getting financial aid for "caring" for her. They will probably not allow her to go easily if they stand to lose a monthly financial stipen. 

    She may have no other choice other than to wait until her 18th birthday. At which point they will probably kick her out because the buck stops there.

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  • 1 month ago

    In some states you can get married under 18 WITHOUT parental permission.  Find out the laws for your state.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Here's the legal issue - because she is underage her guardians (family, cousins, whatever) get to pick and choose who she sees and when she sees "him."  You've been told to stay away.  If you DON'T stay away you can be charged with custodial interference.  I wouldn't take the chance.

    She can get emancipated (and I highly doubt she qualifies) or wait until she's 18 and then move out.

    You are not on solid legal ground here.

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  • 1 month ago

    She doesnt have much choices except to wait until she is 18. Then she can leave amd never look back

    • Edna
      Lv 7
      1 month agoReport

      When she's 18 and it dawns on her that she's now financially and legally responsible for herself, her relatives probably couldn't prise her out of their house with a crowbar.

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