barbon1999 asked in HealthMen's Health · 2 months ago

Birth defect I really need some help?

I have a birth defect in my left arm, my left arm is a bit shorter by a few inches and thinner than my right arm. I can't turn over my palm or lift fully over my head. I was 11 1/2 lbs when I was born and the doctor couldn't get my out so he yanked my left arm causing me permanent damage in my left arm. It's been very difficult to live with it through childhood. Now I am trying to lift weights and strengthen it but it's not working well... My whole l have suffered.. People asking me what's wrong with my arm and no girl with date me.. People look at me like I'm a freak. Then some pity me. It's a curse but I had to accept it and it's lowers my value as a person. I don't know what to do anymore. No doctor would help me even when I was a child. Help help me? What can I do to strengthen it?

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  • Angel
    Lv 7
    2 months ago
    Favourite answer

    Gee, I’m sorry that your having such a tough go at things, but your only a “freak” because you accept that your defective and you have not pushed yourself hard enough to seek out the answers to your questions.

    So what that you were born with an arm slightly shorter than the other and slightly narrower.  My brother has one leg, they called him hop-along in school.  His response was “Yes! And dam proud of it... what can you do that’s special.... a big n.o.t.h.i.n.g. “.  My brother ne’er let things sloe him down, he bike rides, horseback rides, swims, can hop up or down a flight of stairs, 

    Because you were born not out of a cookie cutter mold doesn’t mean your defective.  It doesn’t give you the right to be a freak, or an unpardonable.  You are what you make of yourself.

    Has anyone ever stopped you from learning how to read, write or express yourself?  Has anyone kept you from doing anything? Or is it your keeping yourself from becoming something and someone fun because you have it in your head your defective do you have given up before really trying.

    East did the orthopedic specialist day?  Have you even tried a spirts medicine doctor yet?  Ever have your muscles tested?  What are your physical limitations besides one arm being smaller than the other.  What’s wrong with your feet.  Why can’t you walk.  Your legs strong enough for you to stand!  How about your back, can you sit in a chair by yourself, are you able to bathe and dress yourself?

    If you have. David yes to these questions then you have a minor set back with what you preserve as @ not perfect body.

    Trust me girls are not looking for an Adonis man to befriend, date and marry.  If that were the case then 90% of the population would be in a bad place.

    There are so many things that people have going on in their lives, many invisible things That looking on the outside you cannot see anything wrong really.  One of my best friends he Is moderately retarded.  He is unable to functionally read, cannot write.  After fourty years of practicing he has learned to print his name.  He has learned to dress himself and has learned to do his own laundry.  He can make his one bed and keep his room clean.  Not bad at 60 years old eh?  He knows he’s not as smart as everyone else but he doesn’t give up. He knows eomen don’t like “dummies” as he has labeled himself.., but this “dummie” has his own condo, goes on vacation four times a year, has everything he nerved and wants.  Can you say that everyone you know has paid for the place they live, doesn’t have to worry about money and can do pretty much as they please?   No credit card debt at all.

    I was stuck in a wheelchair 20 years ago because of a drunk driver.  It truly sucks and that I think it was really unfair that the protein that did this to me is free to walk about eith the general public, free to get ripped again and drive drunk and try and kill another person when they pass out behind the wheel....  But the judge slapped her on the hands and I had to get on with my life.  I could have stayed and dollied day in a pity party of poor me.   Lost my house, my car, my independence but I have gained new friends and have learned new skills and do new things in my life that keep me going.

    If I were to sit and mutter and go over every short coming in my life, whine about all the injustices And plant my feet in the ground complaining on how unfair life is and how unfair things are.  

    You think having an arm an inch or two is noticeable... try being 16” taller than anyone your age ever.  Being mistaken for an adult at 8 years old.  That Nobody wants to befriend the mighty Amazon woman.  Yea I heard them all, Wonder Woman, Amazon queen, Mrs Greeg Giant, Sasquatches mom or daughter.... hey stretch...  do you play basketball?   At 6’6” as an 11 year old, no kid on the planet wants to be near the Giant sequoia.

    Everyone’s got their problems, it’s how you choose to deal with them that determines your worth.  You can dit back, point fingers, it’s his fault, or they won’t let me....   it’s not fair that.....  or you can simply grow up, become a mature responsible man instead of a boy and do something about your situation.  Once you have covered all the possible solutions and only then if absolutely nothing can be done Medically or surgically, therapy wide, then you would get about an hours worth of putty before moving on.

    Use what you have to make your life what you want from it.  If one doctor days no then see another, if they say tough boogie then see the next, then the next and yet another.  I waded through about elEven doctors before I found one that thought we could improve my life.  But always keep in mind for me.....,.. Your life is what you choose to make of it, not what others think. 

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  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    You need to see a proper sports physio, not a personal trainer, for a one-to-one.  Let them try to figure out what exactly is wrong with your arm.  (For example, I'm missing my pectoris minor and have really weird things going on with the muscle attachment points in my arms.  I also have trouble with my neck because I too was delivered by an idiot who tore all the ligaments on one side of my neck.  I really hope your mom was okay, btw.)  You need to work with the grain of what you have and not with what isn't.  Let the physio suggest exercises.  It will probably involve some trial and error.  It took me a few years of on and off looking to find the right physio for me and it changed my life to work out what I could do instead of knowing what I couldn't.  I don't need to see one anymore (unless something bad happens) because I now know how to move my body best and which exercises work for me.  I can't stress it enough that you need a one-to-one to know what to do.  People will stop pitying you once you carry yourself with assurance.  They'll always be curious but there's a hella difference between curiosity and pity.

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