Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 4 months ago

In love with this guy but confused because he’s had his fun where I haven’t. Please read ?

So I’m 20 and have never been with a guy. For the last 4 months I been talking to someone and he is my dream guy but at the same time it’s like I never got to have my fun.. if you know what I mean? This guy has dated 6 girls slept with 2 but just found out he had a friend with benefits then he wanted a threesome since high school never got one and now he’s saying he doesn’t want one (not sure if he’s just saying that for me even though he says no) but, this guy has had his fun even in bondage as I heard. I feel confused cause it makes me feel insecure and jealous he got to have his fun he did whatever and I didn’t. But at the same time I don’t wanna loss him because he’s everything I ever wanted when go into a relationship 

2 Answers

  • There's nothing confusing about this. Not everyone is on your schedule in terms of intimacy. When you start asking people about stuff like this, it never ends well because inevitably, one of you will be more experienced than the other. It's one thing to ask if he's seeing anyone or if he has an STD/STI (or if he has kids).

    In the future, don't ask about past relationships, and if someone asks you about them, don't feel compelled to reveal details (whatever it is you did before meeting someone was not/is not/never will be their business). So "if" you had a one night stand, had multiple partners or enjoyed some BDSM, or whatever, it's your business. Rolling your kink out in a relationship can be tricky.

    Also, people (especially guys) will lie about how many people they've been with because the belief is that it makes them look 'better' in some circles (it doesn't), and some women (not all) will suppress their number lest someone call them a harlot, jezebel, or a sl*t.

    Here's a few things he should understand: consent (when you both give enthusiastic consent you're probably going to have a great experience), being a generous lover, putting your enjoyment at the forefront, communicating (a simple "how's this?" is great) and practicing safe sex (this means condoms).

  • 4 months ago

    I'm not sure why you'd be jealous (or even keep talking to) a guy who has to announce his sexual past to you. That's too much information, and i am never impressed if a guy starts going on about his sexual history. When one does, i never talk to him again because that's really inappropriate.

    Believe me, i'm not a prude, my guy and i have a very open and different sort of sex life. Still, we aren't so childish as to sit around talking about our sexual exploits of the past. What's the point?

    You said you're "talking to someone" at the beginning of this question. You didn't say you have ever even met. So you don't know what he's like in person at all. Plus he's just been talking to you.. never even asked you out?

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