Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingAdoption · 8 months ago

Is what I’ve been reading about gay guys true?

My son is gay. That’s something I’ve struggled a lot with, but have come to accept. If that’s how he wants to live his life, fine. 

However, him and his boyfriend are now in the process of adopting a child. I’m supposed to be a character witness who’ll be interviewed by the adoption agency. In recent weeks though, I’ve been reading about how gay guys are more likely that any other group to be paedophiles and abuse children. I don’t want a child to suffer at their hands. I’m wondering if I should mention my suspicions of paedophilic behaviour to the agency.

8 Answers

  • 7 months ago

    It's your son you should know his character. You raised him and have been around him for a lot of his life, you would've seen prior signs of this before now. What it sounds like is you've read some articles and are having unnecessary fears. Have you checked your sources of these articles, are they actually backed by any science? You say you've struggled with his choice but have come to accept it; this might be a part of your old mindset creeping in. Maybe you need to not give the reference and reevaluate your thinking. Would you truly be this worried if it were him and his wife? Straight couples can abuse their children too, would you mention this fact to the agency? The whole point of this is you should already be familiar with your sons morals and what kind of a person he is, you shouldn't be swayed by this article. 

  • 8 months ago

    If you have doubts about your son's character and fitness, then you should either refuse to be a character reference or else be truthful during the interview. A social worker won't care what you've read about groups of people you don't actually know, but he or she would certainly need to know if you have some specific concerns about your son or his partner.

    If, for any reason, you feel that this adoption is not in a child's best interests, you don't need to be part of the process.

  • 8 months ago

    I’m so sorry I can’t begin to comprehend all of this and speak about it all in short. The information you read is completely false. It is the way your son is raised that will determine his adult behavior towards the adopted child!! If you raised him correctly and taught him that pedophilia is anything BUT okay, please do not lie to the agency and ruin your sons chances at having a family!!!!! Thank you for coming to this website and asking, I understand your concern, but the information you read is completely completely COMPLETELY untrue! Let your son have a family!

  • 8 months ago

    If you believe that your son and his partner are pedophiles (seriously?) then bow out of being a character witness. I can not imagine the pain you must be going through thinking that your son would want to adopt a baby in order to molest and abuse them.

    However, since you have zero knowledge of this being true, at all... just refuse to be a character witness. Tell your SON not the adoption agency. You Son needs to find someone else to speak in his behalf. NOT YOU!

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  • 8 months ago

    Do you have any actual reason to believe that they are engaging in paedophilic behaviors? Or, is it only your "reading"? Whatever you are reading is actually false information, the vast majority of paedophiles are actually men who identify as straight. Stick to their actual character, if you have suspicions based upon something factual or things you've witnessed, yes you should absolutely report those things to police... however, if you are suspicious because you are reading trash, nope.

  • Anonymous
    8 months ago

    < I’ve been reading about how gay guys are more likely that any other group to be paedophiles and abuse children >


    Don't tell me, you're a member of some evangelical church.

  • LizB
    Lv 7
    8 months ago

    How in the world do you conclude that gay men are more likely to be abusers of children when the majority of child molestation victims are female? 

  • Tulip
    Lv 7
    8 months ago

    Beyond stupid and that includes the idea that homosexuality is a choice.

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