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I think i may have ruined my life, what should i do now?

Im a 23 year old white male, served in the Air Force, decent grades all through school, graduated with honors. never touched anything illegal in my life, I just don t know where i went wrong.

In my freshman year of high school my mother passed away unexpectedly and created a rift in my family that has torn it apart. i no longer even speak to any of my relatives (or anyone else for that matter) except for my father, who has been in and out of my life several times since then.

I enlisted almost immediately after i graduated because my father (58 at the time) did not have a job and could not support himself and my little sister with his disability check. at that point things looked like they were getting better and at one point i was even able to rent a nice place and had them move in with me.

But it didnt last.

an incident with fellow airmen at my base escalated to the point that i was faced with a general discharge for simply "failing to make my peers (higher ranking no less) follow proper procedures" before i even finished my first term.

after the heartache of having to tell my family that we would have to move back to the RV that we had been living in before i joined, i discovered a new problem: no employer would hire me.

i searched for a job for almost 6 months before i was finally picked up by the local dominos as a delivery driver. I was treated with so much contempt by my co-workers as i was forced to explain my discharge in detail in front of the entire staff during the interview just to be considered for the job. i quit after 2 months when the store owner told me i was to work 21 days straight due to a misplaced wallet on my way to work.

i now live with my father and his sisters and their kids on a communal property that my grandmother owns. every day i get asked why i dont have a job yet, and the only answer i can give them is "im un-hirable".

All of these things that have happened up to this point i have considered just life being life, but im at a loss as to what to do after this next part. last week i was sitting outside minding my own business when i started shouting at my nephews who were being excessively rowdy on a trampoline. i was immediately scolded by EVERY person in the vicinity and i was told that i should stay inside away from the kids because i was "scaring them". Im not a very large or intimidating guy so this overwhelmed me emotionally that my own family would treat me like some predator. I left and went to get some thing to eat to cool my head, and when i got back i was greeted with accusations of causing the children to get hurt. apparently none of the adults in the area were paying attention to the kids but me, and when i left one of them broke his arm falling off the trampoline.

TL:DR can t leave my bed from fear of being attacked for existing within my own family.

2 Answers

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  • Iam
    Lv 6
    1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    You've got it pretty bad right now. Is there any way e.g. community college that you can get more qualifications? Is there any subject or trade which you are interested in and could be more attractive to employers or which might give you another opening i.e. building, plumbing, anything like that?

    What about gardening services - that is a pretty low investment business? OR: What about some volunteering - is there anywhere where you can volunteer for a bit, to rebuild your reputation, get a bit of experience maybe even get a god reference from? ALSO put something back into your community and more importantly - get out of the house!

    Good luck.

    • ...Show all comments
    • Iam
      Lv 6
      1 month agoReport

      Start with local community groups, which will be registered in the town hall, most likley. Start at the town hall. Check out your local church, they may have some local projects. Check out mainstream charites on line - they may have local opportunities to get involved

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  • Ana
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    It sounds like all of these things that happened are kind of tragic, but they’re also pretty much your fault. You need to start taking responsibility for your actions if you want your life to get better.

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