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Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

My fiance is becoming a very negative person and has a bad attitude every single morning?

She snaps at me, is nobody, or insecure about our relationship. She wants to be lovey dovey 24/7 and it's anoying. She does not want to go back to work, or clean her room. I no longer can stand being in her room or sharongvher bed because of the clutter piles from the floor up. So I sleep in the guest room.

She keeps saying I dont love her, and questioning us. It's getting draining to the point I have to avoid her in the same house.

She wont see a therapist, exercise, and she argues and raises her voice of Ibtry to suggest she clean up.

Im.tired of hearing about her bad marriage in the past too.

I want to better myself, but she causes me anxiety lately.

Its concerning me, and the drama shes always complaining about her problems on facebook, and posting negativity in the world. We have happy times, but its random.

I cant just pack and leave either. Because she wont work, I am low income. We have our ups and downs, but I cannot stand her attitude anymore and cussing she does.

I get angry too. Im not a saint.

I too can be messy, but I try very hard to clean. Its exausting. I almost regret moving here with her, but I love our pets.


I mean the house! She wont even take out the trash!  She cooks and does dishes. That's it! I cook too.

Update 2:

All the pets are mine technically. She can have the cats. We want to move away from here.

Update 3:

No, she not all bad. Shes helped me out a lot. I mean a lot. Supported me, got me things I need, or wanted.

I just wish she looked more hot and was tidy. Also less miserable 

6 Answers

  • 1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    Why don't you clean up her room real good yourself and see how she responds to that. In a case like this being negative will eventually make the situation worse so only trying to work together to make life best for both of you will work. Maybe you can set an example by doing the cleaning yourself then try to get her to do cleaning with you and finally try to find out what chores each of you can do that shares the chores so that each of you do the things yo prefer to do and some things you do together maybe assigning a certain day for cleaning or doing laundry. If you cannot work something out like that then it sounds like the relationship is either doomed or going to be a very bad one for both of you. And if things were going better you both would probably more loving towards each other. And if disagreements arise try to make compromises that each of you can live with. And even though it is nice to be loving you should each have some alone time to do things that you prefer to do by yourself but not too much time apart maybe an evening or some portion of a day.where you each can do your own things.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Teach her to mind her thoughts in the morning. Go ahead and sleep in your own room sometimes. Encourage her to avoid negativity on social media.

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    maybe you shouldnt marry her if shes going to be like that

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  • Ana
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    You should divorce. If you’re low income, you don’t have much to lose. Kick her out

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    It's obvious what happened here.  You and your "fiancee" took some big relationship steps long before you were ready.  As a couple, you weren't ready to live together, and you certainly aren't ready to be engaged.  Also, you keep saying she won't get a job, but you don't say why.  In one sense, it doesn't even matter, because this is completely unacceptable.  

    There's only one answer to give you, and that is you blow this thing up.  If you got the pets together, that was yet another big mistake, because you'll have to agree on how to split them up.  But none of this should have happened.  The worse you make her sound (and she sounds  awful!) the more it says about you and your choices.  You jumped the gun on all of it.

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  • 1 month ago

    Tell her the truth that you would feel better about her and the situation if she would get her sorry butt up and work or clean the house.  Tell her to get the therapy she needs or get a job or whatever or you are not going to marry her and then leave if she does not. 

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