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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsWeddings · 1 month ago

Fiancé wants everyone in wedding but I won’t include sister because her disrespectful behavior ?

My fiancé has only 1 sister, she’s the baby of his family and 18 years old.

 She has never been respectful of me. I have been around for over 3 years

 (engaged for over a year) Her being the only sister of the family out of 3 boys, I’ve always tried to get close to her and invite her to do “sister like things.” For example- going out for pedicures, makeovers, spa days, lunch/dinner ETC and she doesn’t budge, or leaves my messages on seen.

She’s never addressed me by my name, I’ve always been “her” or if given anything it’s “here.” Almost as if I’m just some stranger.. my fiancé has spoken to her and told her she doesn’t have to like me, but to respect me. For years, it’s never happened.

I’m not putting her in my wedding, more than what I’ve discussed on her part has happened. I truly don’t think she support our marriage that’s why I truly don’t trust the girl. 

She is invited to the wedding but not an attendee.  YET all her 3 brothers are grooms. I don’t feel bad, but not she’s calling my fiancé wondering why and upset. My fiancé told her to talk/ask me, but she refuses. My fiancé wants to have peace and everyone included FOR THE DAY. Aside the drama that’s happened. What should I do?

16 Answers

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  • Carol
    Lv 5
    4 weeks ago

    Its really the Bride's call when it comes to choosing bridesmaids. You don't tell him who the groomsmen are.

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  • 1 month ago

    This is where your groom takes action to set the record straight;

    Have your groom sit his sister and his mother down for a serious conversation.  He reminds his mom and sister how poorly the sister has treated you over the past three years.  Therefore, she is not welcomed to be in your bridal party because she is not for you, but against you. However, she is welcomed to attend the wedding and if she so much has a rude remark or misbehaves in anyway, she will be escorted from the premises.

    This is your groom's job, not yours.  If he refuses to do so, then you have more problems other than his bratty little sister.

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  • 1 month ago

    All 3 brothers are grooms? She's not calling your fiance wondering why so why be worried about it?

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  • Kelly
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    "My way or no way" generally is a short marriage....

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  • sarah
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    She does not deserve to be included. Your bridal party is supposed to be people who love and support you, and it doesn't seem like she does either of those things.

    Also, if I were you, I would have the officiant cut the whole "speak now or forever hold your peace" part from his speech. She seems like the kind that would object.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    You probably shouldn't even invite her.

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  • 1 month ago

    A bride picks ONLY the people closest to her as bridesmaids.

    You're not close, or even friends - so you don't need to pick her.

    If he wants her involved in the day, ask her to do a reading or something. But it would not be suitable to have her as a bridesmaid.

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If you can't see that marriage involves A LOT of compromise and leaving your ego at the door you're not ready to get married. This sister isn't going anywhere so you can either make peace with her or plan on divorcing in the not too distant future because she's part of his family, she was there first and when it comes down to it the family will always choose her over you. Don't start your married life off on this diva tip or you'll just be wasting your time and money by getting married at all.

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    i wouldnt include her either if she acted like that

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  • n2mama
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    You have the right to choose your attendants, and you should choose who you want standing up for you. If your fiancé doesn’t understand your issues with his sister, that’s a whole different set of issues that need to be addressed. If it’s super important to him that she be included, then he can have her stand up on his side with the brothers as one of HIS attendants.

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