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Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 3 months ago

Do men prefer to say “I love you” first?

4 Answers

  • Janet
    Lv 7
    3 months ago
    Favourite answer

    Oh yes.

    It takes the average well-adjusted female about 6 months of steady dating before she becomes close enough to the guy to think she loves him. Sooner than that, and it has nothing to do with love .. it is just inner inadequacy hoping someone/anyone can "fix" us. And the more we hope another will fix us, the more we poison a long-term relationship with them.

    It takes the average well-adjusted male about a YEAR to feel the same way. And sooner is also bad news for the same reason.

    For men, a woman saying "I love you" usually gets linked with him thinking she wants to get married, to have him support her and a bunch of children. And here he is, only HALF-WAY to even THINKING he MIGHT want to spend the rest of his life with this woman, and she is cornering him with "I love you".

    And that is assuming he IS ready to marry at all. Men who are not ready to commit, no matter how long they have been dating you, will never want to hear you say "I love you" first.

    Just wait until he is ready. And the more uncomfortable or fearful you are waiting for this, the less ready you ARE to make a relationship work. Because the less happy you are as a person and the more you are hoping a relationship fixes you. Truth is that the "honeymoon phase" is always temporary, and many relationships die out when the honeymoon phase dies out. Those that do not die out, start to have problems, and those problems take about 20 years of marriage for both parties to learn how to accept each other and stop fighting.

    In other words, no one can make us lastingly happy if we were not already happy before we met them. And love is THE hardest thing we will ever achieve in life.

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  • Nunya
    Lv 5
    3 months ago

    Men should never say "I love you" first, especially not after a few weeks of dating or of having sex. It may cause the woman to lose respect and interest in him really quickly. The name of the game is to make HER say it first. If the woman says it then she does respect you and look up to you. If you say it first then you could come off as clingy, desperate, weak, and insecure to her. Even if you feel the urge to say it, even if you feel it too, always wait for the woman to say it first. 


    Lea: I love you.

    Han: I Know. 

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  • Dze
    Lv 7
    3 months ago

    im pretty sick of hearing it myself .. i'd say out the the last several gf's ive been through 100% of them have said that within the first week lol .. just dont .. ok ..

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  • Anonymous
    3 months ago

    Not in my experience. I had an ex tell me years later that he always waited to make sure the girl said it first even he really did love them.

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