How can I tell my boyfriend’s mother that I don’t want to do her college work for her anymore?
My issue is pretty difficult considering I live with her for free, I’m pregnant with her son’s daughter and she helps me get from place to place while I gather the money to raise our family on our own. I feel very indebted to her, but this is getting to be TOO MUCH.
My boyfriend’s mother is cape verdean and when she first asked me to help her with her homework, I did so with the intention of teaching her how to do it on her own. However because there is a little bit of a language barrier, I noticed that teaching her took WAAAAYYY too long and I would just get frustrated and end up doing the work myself. NOW this has been going on for two years and I am FED UP.
I have written every one of her essays, speeches, I even learned COMPUTER SCIENCE for her so I could answer her questions for homework. It’s to the point where I do every assignment her teachers ask her to do even down to the take-home tests.
I have complained to my boyfriend that I am sick of how many times she asks me to write pages and pages of homework and he keeps trying to talk to her but she just doesn’t listen! What can I do to tell her, look, I appreciate your help, but I can’t keep cheating for you and I am not doing your homework anymore!
- 2 months ago
Say please go to the tutoring center. Because if she gets a letter from tutoring center for the hours she attends she will get extra points from the professor.
- charlatanLv 72 months ago
you can walk away from her and her son for good,
what is preventing you from doing that?
you have to bite a/the bullet.
you will always pay the price willingly or
unwillingly for one or the other.
- SumDudeLv 72 months ago
- Anonymous2 months ago
I know something you don't know. If she gets something after graduating from college then she will never succeed in life with her a$$wipe credentials if you continue doing her work, for her, so just let her assume she will be successful ok. I hope she won't kick you out despite the fact that you should be kicked out!!!
Her son is pathetic just like her. He should be getting money. NOT YOU!!!
You should not even be doing college homework. I really don't know why you chose to live with that useless b**ch, and her f**ked up son.
In the real world SHE would have to prove that SHE can do the work. There is NO way she can get around this because she would have to produce something if she wants to work.
I am already at this stage in my life, so what I am doing is I am using as much as I learned to produce something, and eventually other people will see it. I would not be surprised if other people started to ask me questions about it, but if not then that's fine with me.
FYI....I have a college education, and I also surpassed it too on my own.
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- Anonymous2 months ago
So, move out and support your butt on your own. You're getting free room and board. Boo hoo hoo.
- DCM5150Lv 72 months ago
Just start with the next assignments or whatever. Say "When you finish the assignment, I will look over it for you." If she says she doesn't know how to do it, point her to references (textbooks, online, etc). Essentially, just stop actually doing the work, but still offer your assistance in the way you probably should have been doing in the first place. It may take a little time. And of course if she keeps trying to get you to do stuff, just say "I don't feel well, I need to sleep" and go lock yourself in a bedroom.
It would not be wise to simply say something like "Do it yourself!" But you want to encourage her to stand on her own.
- PearlLv 72 months ago
just tell her you cant do it anymore
- ExpatLv 62 months ago
Don’t stop! You created this monster by not doing what you set out to do - help her so she could then do it on her own. Seems like this is more than your “boyfriend” or your boyfriend’s mother; you’re having this man’s child and her grandchild. She’s your mother in law and her completing the degree will mean a better life for all of you, and she’ll forever be indebted to you. Don’t just quit on her, or all the work and expense from both of you will be for nothing. “Some college” doesn’t count for ANYTHING but a job at McDonald’s - NOTHING. So help her to take the wheel herself. After she’s done, go to college yourself; it’s clear you can handle it. It may be cheating (and I’m a university professor, but I’m also a pragmatist), but this is your family and you’re doing your part for the family. Best to just do what you aimed to do from the start.
- MercyLv 72 months ago
You say, " I appreciate your help, but I can’t keep cheating for you and I am not doing your homework anymore!"