Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Society & CultureEtiquette · 4 weeks ago

Is it wrong that I blame my mom for her death?

My mom died of Aids in the early 200's in Africa her diagnosis didn't came as surprise because she took up commercial sex for living or to supplement her income. This was on regular basis from the early 90's when she seperated from my Dad to the time she started getting sick in 2001. Part of the reason why they divorced was my Dad wanted her to study and go back to school and she was refusing. She met my dad when she was 17 in high school and when she got pregnant with me she had to drop out. So when my sister was born, my Dad wanted her to continue education and she was refusing.  So they seperated and this reason played a part in it. After the sepearation we were sent to live with our grandparents and mom went to different city to look for work. She could have went back to school and do something better with her life. Without school, its hard to find work in Africa so she resorted into sex work for a living. She never told anyone this but we figured it out when we went to live with her brifely and when she would take us to Holidays. She tried being discreet about it but we knew what was going on. Every night a different men and on regular basis. I don't why she thought this was safe thing to do. Now her death altered my life and its hard growing up without a mom. Her death could have been prevented and different lifestyle choices could've had different outcome. Is it wrong that i'm angry at her even though deep down

i still love her?

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  • 4 weeks ago
    Favorite Answer

    Feelings are not right or wrong. They're just feelings. You feel how you feel.

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  • PAMELA
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    Of course you should not be angry will her, it was not her fault was it? she was trying to get money to raise you, i would be proud of her,she was your mother who loved you very much.

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    i dont think youre wrong for feeling that way

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  • g
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    Be angry but you have to find acceptance that's what she felt she had to choose at the time. Who knows what other pressures pushed her in that direction. It's not always as simple as it appears on the surface.

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  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    How is this an etiquette question?

    Move it to mental health or psychology.

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  • 4 weeks ago

    no---feelings are never wrong--they are what they are...are you justified in those feelings?  I'd say yes. she did cause her own death--you will need to forgive her for that so that you can move on from it.

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  • 4 weeks ago

    No, it is not wrong that you blame your mom for her death. Your mom's choice of a profession can lead to aids.  Not wrong of you at all but to move on and let this go you will have to forgive your mom even though she is dead. Please forgive your mom for your peace and happiness.  Cause what happens going forward is your doing and not your mom's because she has passed on.  Good Luck in life.  I know it can be hard. 

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  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    It sounds like your father is the one to blame here, for forcing her into a situation where he knew she was going to be unable to support herself.

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