Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 8 months ago

Relationship advice pls ?

okay so I’m dating this guy. he tells me he loves me and I’m pretty sure I love him too. I’m in grade 11 btw. he says he loves me but I barely feel it anymore like I’ve confronted him about it saying how I don’t feel loved and he’s like I swear I do I’m just really bad at showing it. We’ve been dating for 2 months now and we’ve been friends (texting) for like 6 months before we started dating. We started seeing each other 1-2 months before he officially asked me out. The first two times he didn’t even touch me and we were just talking (I’m a bit shy at first) and then the third time we met we had our first kiss and he lives 30mins away from me so we only see each other once every 2-3 weeks so each type we do it gets a little more physical than the rest. Next week he told me he wants to have sex and we’ve been talking about it for a while now and I kept saying no but now I think I’m acc ready (I’m a virgin he’s not- he’s slept with 1). The thing is he shows me he cares when something is wrong with me but when we text I don’t feel the love and attention. In a relationship I just think the one thing I need is love and I’m not getting that from him over text. I also understand that I’m supposed to love myself and not need attention from other people. But I can’t help to think if I should end it with him. We had good plans for summer and I don’t want that just to end. 

Update:

Look at comments for extension of problems please

3 Answers

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  • Helen
    Lv 7
    8 months ago
    Favourite answer

    How are things when you meet in person? Do you feel loved, relaxed and comfortable then?

    The truth is, you are not going to feel "loved" over a computer screen or via a text. That isn't a real relationship. Seeing each other once every 2-3 weeks is not a real relationship. You need to spend continuous time with someone to build up a strong emotional bond and for that to develop into love. 

    On that basic alone I would say it's unlikely that he loves you. Maybe he has strong feelings for you. Maybe he does love you, as a friend, since you started out that way. 

    Breakups are hard whatever the circumstances. But it's your choice. It seems clear to me that this is not the right relationship for you in the long-term, and if you know something's not right, there's no point dragging it out. 

    Always listen to your gut instinct and don't do anything that doesn't feel right or you're not 100% sure you want to do.

  • Anonymous
    8 months ago

    Get an older guy with a job and a place to live then you have a chance of being a real wife of some type. Don't be a feminist.

  • Anonymous
    8 months ago

    I also don’t see myself in a future with him though because he doesn’t have real goals in life and isn’t as hard working as me.He always talks about getting married to me but I just can’t see it. I argue with him a lot and always talk about breaking up but then neither of us want to at the end. I care for him so much but I don’t know if it’s the right decision for me to have sex with him and I don’t want to say no again because I’ve already said no like three times and he feels led on. Should I break up with him? Or do I just need to start loving myself more? Please help!

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