Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 8 months ago

I divorced my husband for this new guy thinking it was for the best but I don’t know why I have a bad feeling about this new man. Advice?

I feel like he only wants sex. Also we used to talk all the time now he barely calls or texts me. Marriage with my husband was dying and becoming dull.. then we were arguing so much. I wrote it off as us being incompatible so I divorced and started talking to this new guy and we seemed to hit it off great we were on the phone laughing and joking for hours. My husband doesn’t have a sense of humor. My husband is more serious minded and he’s more of a protector kind of person who likes to look out for people’s safety. I love to laugh and make others laugh. I think I mostly fell for him because he made me laugh all the time all day. We went on a couple dates in person and had sex and the sex was kind of weird because I’m used to passionate sex when the man kisses me and makes me feel so loved. He immediately went into penetration with no foreplay no kissing and he came in like 10 seconds. Then I asked him if he was gonna kiss me and he acted like he didn’t even want to foreal he gave me a peck. No deep passionate kissing. I was like is this dude serious. He act like he was afraid to kiss me but wasn’t afraid to have sex. I don’t get it.he said he’s taking me to out to dinner and to bowling next weekend for a date so he is interested in me but why the lack of passion and romance? He seemed like the type to be extremely passionate and romantic especially with our long phone calls

32 Answers

  • 8 months ago

    Wow ppl are mean lol ok so clearly your use to a certain type of sexual partner and in this case u got with a what they call a f*** boy. No big deal. U have sex which is trash and keep it moving. I could tell u don’t have experience either when it comes to dating. The fact that u got a divorce was not a mistake like most might say. U clearly weren’t happy so good job being honest there but I don’t think your the let’s just mess around type so keep your legs closed for a while and get to know them. And tell them what u want girl it’s what men want to hear anyway lol good luck 

  • Helen
    Lv 7
    8 months ago

    So you've realized the grass isn't greener. 

    Things could have been salvageable with your husband if you'd both put a little more effort in and communicated with each other. Marriage DOES get boring, dull and monotonous. The shine eventually wears off, in ANY relationship. The drudgery of real life sets in, you realize neither of you are perfect. 

    You threw away something real for a childish fantasy.

    Learn a lesson from this. The grass is greener when you water it.

  • 8 months ago

    Sounds like your the fish on the line of his fishing pole reeling you in for his needs been here before 

  • 8 months ago

    Your problem is very common among girls who are quick to have sex with men that they have not gotten to really know long enough before engaging in quick sex.

    If you had gotten to know your new boyfriend, you would know, really know he is not a passionate individual. I am guessing that you got together and went straight to sex. You do realize that while you're in bed with a man, you still have a voice. You could have told him that you wanted more foreplay but you chose not to.

    You seem to be making one mistake after the other. I think it's time for you to do some self-help.

    This new guy that you are with has clearly shown you what his idea of sex is. This is who he is. If you do not like it, get out of the relationship because you are not powerful enough to change him.

    This has been a great lesson for you to learn not to jump into bed with another guy until you get to know him better.

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  • 8 months ago

    QUIK DRAW MCGRAW, ready aim fire. It must seem like you traded a Cadillac for a Yugo because I didn't see you complaining about your husband being this way. Who taught you about sex, your ex? What was your problems that caused you to be arguing so much, I doubt if you were still having sex with him, correct. Guys aren't always what they put up to be.

  • 8 months ago

    that happens in all relationships, even long term marriages.

  • Anonymous
    8 months ago

    you screwed up

    but did you learn.... this is very common - women dream of dime store novel romance

    go looking for it and then are always disappointing

    you left safe and good for a hollow dream 

    if your husband is as good as you said he is better off and moved on 

    you need to realize you cannot go home and if you do will always be obligated to make it up to him for ever 

    you have to 1st get a hold of your self and who and what you are

    you have to start all over and realize your last approach was real bad 

    as well I grade your creative writing as fair 

    you said 

    " I’m used to passionate sex when the man kisses me and makes me feel so loved" 

    but said 

    "Marriage with my husband was dying and becoming dull." 

    who were you kissing so passionate? 

    BUT your story is a  common one and older women find out the hard way,,,,, you are not 20 anymore and you cannot abuse men like you did when 20 

  • 8 months ago

    Unfortunately, the move you made found you with a man who sounds as if he only interested in the sexual relationship with you and, one that is solely for his sexual gratification. I would strongly suggest that you leave him ASAP. Then, start the remainder of your remaining life which can be as fulfilling as you wish it to be. Good luck

  • 8 months ago

    You got divorced for the wrong reasons. Bad move. You'll just have to see how this new one turns out. Don't expect a Ford to perform like your Ferrari did.

  • 8 months ago

    Look before you leap.

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