What does this mean?
I recently got a new kitten and she really likes my older cat. Sometimes he will play with her but sometimes he gets fed up and hisses at her. But for some reason whenever they’re both in my room at the same time he gets scared and hisses at her and runs out. And he’s not sleeping in my room he’s sleeping downstairs. I’m really sad because he used to sleep with me every night but now he sleeps downstairs alone. I want him to feel safe sleeping with the kitten with me in my room. Any tips? I guess I just feel like a mother who’s favoring a child because the new kitten is now being the one who sleeps with me each night.
- PRLv 78 months ago
Seems like you have asked this question before. It might help to know how old the kitten is, how long you have had the kitten, and how you have introduced the two.
A kitten or any new cat should be held in a different room for a few weeks until the older cat gets used to it. Perhaps the resident cat is just a "nice guy" and tries to be nice, but finally has enough.
He probably likes you a lot, and tries to cooperate with this.
Keep the kitten in the bathroom or another room, and stop allowing her to follow him around so much. He is tired of it and wants some space. If the kitten is less than about 14 weeks of age, she should not necessarily have full run of the house, anyway, for safety reasons.
If you can't keep the kitten in another room for awhile, then let them play together for awhile and then place her in a separate area. You need to respect the older cat or you will never have peace, or his respect.
The older cat is just that - an adult with preferences, and an idea in his head that he was there, first. He should have some say in his life, and the kitten is intruding. If you give him breaks throughout the day, it will go a long way in gaining back his trust in you and your ability to usher peace in your own house.
How would you have felt if your "mother" brought in a new three-year-old out of nowhere - without your permission or even asking your opinion, when you were about 14? The toddler wanted to play with you all the time and mess with you, while you just wanted to chill or listen to music? Would you appreciate it, or would you feel a bit put off? An adult cat sees themselves as an adult, and they have adult-like opinions. You HAVE to allow him to adjust to this, at his own pace.
Give him a break, and show you care about him as the original/resident cat. He is the one you need to care about. The kitten will adjust, as youngsters do.
Keep the kitten out of your room, for now. The older cat is not afraid of her when he runs off hissing - he is offended and hurt that you have let her invade the one place he feels secure. He needs some spot for HIS. And, perhaps his and yours, without the kitten. If you allow him this, he may eventually become friends with the kitten. If you don't, he may continue to resent her.
By the way: Cats do have very highly organized ways of looking at things. Our cat who thinks she is "mine" resents it when we foster kittens. She will ignore me, stay upstairs away from everyone; not sit on me; not walk on my computer keyboard (lol), and not interact with the other cats as she normally would. When the kittens leave for new homes, she will eventually work her way back to recognizing me - but she takes her time. Each one has their own spot in a very well-defined heirarchy, and when the balance is upset, they each react differently.
- David B.Lv 78 months ago
The older cat is content to be left alone by the kitten. Cats don't think like people do. Just allow it to keep doing what it is doing. If it wanted to be in your room it would be trying to make the kitten leave. That doesn't appear to be the case. Once the kitten outgrows its playful behavior don't be surprised if the older cat returns to your bed along with him.