Anonymous asked in Business & FinanceOther - Business & Finance · 1 year ago

I need an unbiased opinion on a family matter regarding finance.?

My mom has land behind her house that contains a steel frame barn which was valued at 40k. I work in construction and wanted to try for planning for 2 properties one for me and one for my mom, so the barn was transferred into my name. The plot was unlikely to get planning and after 10 years of work and cost I have managed to get 2 plots one for myself and one for mom (plots valued at 150k each). I have a brother and sister and my mom sees how much I have made now and wants to give them something, which is fine. In my opinion it should not come from me as I have paid my debt of 20k (half the barn) by gaining planning for my mom and doing all the work and taking all the risk. No one would of paid for my time (2000 hours) or loss of finance (20k) if this had not gone through. I am going manage the build to both properties and help out where I can to keep costs down, which will be tough having 2 small children as well as a job. To me I have more than paid for my share (mom will only pay her build cost and materials) of which my brother and sister wanted nothing to do with. My mom just looks at what money I have made and thinks they should have the same so shes talking about splitting the new house between them, it’s her money and it’s up to her what she has does with it. It just feels like I have done all the work & took on all the risk and they will get the same for doing nothing. I am curious to whether I am in the wrong and what people think is a fair sum of money. 

4 Answers

  • NA
    Lv 7
    1 year ago
    Favourite answer

    So, when you had the barn transferred into your name, didn't the gift issue come up when mom filed the first gift tax return (IRS form 709)?  After all, she gave you a $40K gift and that would have necessitated the form.

    And when you had the land subdivided into two parcels and asked mom to change the title on one of them to your name, there would have been a second gift form filed then for the same exact reasons.

    "I have done all the work and took on all of the risk" is a meaningless statement to anyone except you.  Even your mother's unwillingness to put a $ amount on anything except money you actually spent should make this clear to you.

    Your mother is perfectly within her rights to give your siblings, cash, a share in her current home or change her will to leave them, collectively, $195K more than she leaves you.  If she has enough assets, this should make your siblings quiet down.

  • 1 year ago

    I think you should be thrilled that you were able to do something for your siblings.  You should be very proud of your hard work and success.

    Not sure that I understand the money part of your question.  Are you being asked to pay for the construction of their houses?  That would not be fair.

  • 1 year ago

    "my mom sees how much I have made now"

    You and your mom have a different idea on how money is made than I do.

    You increased your networth $130000, if the empty land is really worth $150000.  $150000-$20000 = $130000.  But you really haven't made a penny and won't for a long time, in fact you are going to end up spending a lot more money.... So you won't have made a penny until you begin renting out your unit or sell it.

    Unless your mom has a will or trust and is unmarried, when she dies all the property will be split between all the children = the original house and the new house.  If she wants to do it now, so be it. 

  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    You are entitled to "feel" whatever you want.

    But you're correct that it's her money and it's up to her what she does with it.   She could give it to charity.  She could give it to the mailman.   She could give it to her kids like she intends to.   No one is entitled to anything and there is no requirement that any of her gifts be equally distributed or "fair" in your eyes. 

    Her gifts are up to her so keep your opinion to yourself and butt out except to thank her for what she's already given you.   She owed you nothing.  What she gives anyone else really is none of your business. 

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