Liv asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 4 weeks ago

How Do I Move Forward With My Relationship with My Guyanese Dysfuctional Family?

My family has always been loving, yet there was alot of dysfuctional behaviors that I saw as a kid, to where now as an adult I'm realizing how bad i truly was. I feel that my parents didn't really truly love one another. My sister tries to excuse my Dad's behaviors. The only thing that they ever said when things got bad is 'let it go', 'it already happened'. For me being an American, I do not have that mindset, and this has lead me to have a different relationship with all of them. I have always had anxiety, depression, and now I'm trying to gain my happiness back. I feel that it was sucked out of me over the years. I love them, but I just want to stop being angry at them. My parents are also from the baby boomer generation, and I was born in 1994.

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  • 4 weeks ago

    We cannot change the past. Focus on your plans for the future, which you CAN influence. Catch the brilliant coach Anthony Robbins on Youtube. And/or Gary Vaynerchuk.

  • 4 weeks ago

    Talk about having a good character, about traits that are good, kindness, love, gentleness, integrity.

    Those are the things that are important, not gossip, not appearance, not superficial stuff.

    And learn about the Baha'i Faith here: bahai.us

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    You call it toxic and dysfunctional, but you don't give any examples. Sometimes this matters, because I've seen questions in here where people use those terms and it's simply not true. No family is perfect.

    If it truly was toxic, obviously it's not your fault you grew up that way. But by my math, you're around 25 or so, and this means it's now YOUR job to fix whatever issues remain from your childhood. Some people can do this on their own, but most can't.

    So when you say "move forward", I assume you mean you want to be able to interact with them as an adult, which means setting boundaries for behaviors you refuse to be around. If you still live at home and rely on them, this isn't possible, but that's the 1st thing you fix. Get out on your own and run your own life. Then you decide if counseling would help you figure out how to set those boundaries.

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    See a psychologist. A professional will show you how to get your feelings under control.

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  • 4 weeks ago

    maybe you should talk to them about it

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