Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 1 month ago

Should I reach out to a friend after a fight from over a year and half ago?

I had a friend from high school that I lost touch with after moving away for college. She rekindled our friendship after my mother passed away a few years ago. 

Long story short, we had a falling out after a fight and she hasn’t spoken to me in over a year and a half. It happened after a beer festival where we were both drunk. We had just taken a Lyft to my bf’s friend’s place in Brooklyn and while she was chatting it up with one of his friends I went to find a bathroom at the coffee shop just up the street. I called her while I was there to let her know I was just using the bathroom and she was extremely upset. I returned to her yelling at me for having left her “stranded”. 

We were both intoxicated and a few choice words were said...mostly her calling me a ***** and me justifying the situation by saying she would always leave me stranded while she flirted with guys at clubs she would drag me to. She didn’t seem to like that and said our friendship was over. 

I thought this was just said in a drunken state and even though we didn’t speak the rest of the night, I thought the anger would just go away eventually. 

She left my place the next morning and it has been over 1.5 years since that fight..no word from her. 

Is she just good at holding a grudge or should I just not bother at this point reaching out? 

We had a lot of fun times together and even though we had our differences, I never thought one tiny fight would just end the friendship. I’m very bothered by it. 

8 Answers

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  • 1 month ago
    Best answer

    It never hurts to make an attempt to reconnect, so go for it. But don't try again if don't get a positive reply.

  • 1 month ago

    It depends on how far away they are. If they are really far away, trying to reach them with your very limited arm length could be tough, especially if you hurt your arm in the fight. If they are close, I bet you could do it.

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Yes. This argument sounds like a sudsy, heat of the moment type thing.

  • 1 month ago

    What was the name Tommy and the guy who posted 😂 e for your

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  • 1 month ago

    so u reach out to her if u like her so much. who cares who reaches out first

  • Z
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    My advice is to let her go and move on to other friends. There's a reason why things ended between you - even if you may not consciously know it. Things always happen for a reason. And I can bet you that even if you let her back into your life, she's gonna do something dysfunctional again that will end your friendship (the only consolation will be that after this second time no one has to tell you).

    • Z
      Lv 5
      4 weeks agoReport

      You're free to try to get some 'closure'. But from my experience, when relationships/friendships/marriages end, you never get to know why. People might give you all sorts of ridiculous excuses, but the only truth you need to know is that it has ended. Remember this when you fail to get any answers.

  • 1 month ago

    You could reach out to her if you want, but really why? It is clear you guys do not bring out the best in each other, hopefully over the last year and half you both grew up because no offense intended but you both sounded very immature at that time. Any relationship, friendship included requires effective communication. Something that you guys seemed to lack. My sincere advice would be don't worry or stress over people leaving your life, that's how life goes. People come and go, learn to make peace with friends and others going their own way.

  • g
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    You let it go for a year and a half?? Yes reach out. You should have a long time ago, whether she responded or not.

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