regina asked in PetsCats · 10 months ago

Why is my roommate being so selfish and hostile? What should I do about the situation?

have wanted to adopt a kitten for a long time but have not had a good opportunity until now as my moms friends cat had kittens and she told me I could have the first pick of the litter. I want a kitten as an emotional support animal because I have endured some very tough situations in the last couple of years and I think having an ESA would help me get back on my feet and function normally because it would give me something else to focus on. However, my roommate is being very hostile about it because she doesn't like cats even though shes never been around one and is trying to convince everyone shes allergic although shes not because she doesn't want me to get one. This is weird coming from her because not only did she mention wanting to foster kittens at some point but I told her I wanted to get a cat before we moved in together and she was fine with it and also she has an ESA and she claims that it helps her a lot. She has told me that if I get a kitten she will kick me out of the house and that I don't need an ESA. I didn't really want to live with her ESA dog because sometimes shes too lazy to let him out and he's pooped and peed in our house multiple times but I made an exception because I know she needs him. It just astonishes me that shes being so mean and selfish about it especially considering all the exceptions I made for her and that she knows I havent been doing too great given recent traumas. What should I do about this situation?


Edit: I watched my friends cat for a week and my roommate did not complain and was not allergic. Her dog is very mellow so he got along fine with the cat.

Update 2:

-Landlords have to allow ESAs by law

-My roommate and I are equals on the lease

-I told my roommate I wanted to get a cat before we moved in together and she said she was fine with it

9 Answers

  • 10 months ago

    Move out. She doesnt want a cat and shouldn't have to live with one.

    Not all landlords have to allow an ESA.. None have to allow multiple ESAs in the same dwelling.

    Your roommate isn't under any legal obligation to accept another animal in the home. Its HER home too, and if she doesnt want a cat, she doesn't have to allow it.

  • Ocimom
    Lv 7
    10 months ago

    ESA's are nothing more then glorified pets. They don't have privileges like a REAL service dog does so you won't be able to walk around and take the kitten wherever you want.

    Second it sounds like SHE is the major person on the lease and you moved in with her. Since she is uncooperative about things, then I strongly suggest you start looking for you own place to live by yourself.

  • 10 months ago

    why are you being hostile to your roommate. you want a cat, find a roommate that likes cats or find a way to live on your own.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    10 months ago

    Your roommate has learned that having a *fake* service animal does not cure emotional problems and in fact, can make them worse. Your roommate can't handle the additional burden of taking care of someone who is dependant on them and it is causing her more emotional trauma, likely depression and anxiety. The poor dog is living in squalor, with pee & poop all over the house and the smell that accompanies it. Does your landlord even allow pets or is this "ESA" thing intended to get around their "no pets" rule? Your landlord can still kick both of you out for having pets and especially for having pets that are damaging the house or apartment.

    A true *service* animal has been carefully selected, bred and trained and does not get its credentials from your mom or your mom's stupid friend who lets her unspayed cat roam the neighborhood.

    If you really want a cat, get your own place. Bringing a cat into this situation with your angry, confused roommate and her poor, untrained and/or neglected dog is only going to acerbate your roommate's obvious mental health problems and this will not bode well for you or the kitten.

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  • 10 months ago

    Your roommate said NO to a cat so that means no cat. If you stupidly get one like the crying toddler you are, the room mate has every right to take it to a shelter and drop it off and there's nothing you can legally do or have the LL kick you out or make you get rid of the cat.

    And ESA is only a pet. By law its a pet and you don't need a pet. And if the LL doesn't allow the cat then you have to move or get rid of it since no LL ever has to allow an ESA

    And the room mate is allergic so you are being selfish. And childish.

    "Update 2: -Landlords have to allow ESAs by law "

    FALSE. No lLL ever has to allow ESA. At all. The law is on the side of the LL since by law an ESA is only a pet and if the LL doesn't allow pets then no ESA. IF they ban certain breeds or certain weights, then you can't have it.

  • 10 months ago

    MOVE. you have no business attempting to put a dog and kitten together when the dogs owner doesn't want the kitten around.

    Lv 7
    10 months ago

    She cannot kick you out, only the landlord can do that, and the landlord has to give permission for any pets to be here, it would cause so much trouble if you bought a cat into the apartment i would look for somewhere else to live where you can have a a cat.

  • 10 months ago

    Maybe it’s for your own good. She has a dog. You want a cat. You don’t see any potential conflict. Dogs don’t like cats. Cats don’t like dogs.

    Just out of curiosity, but what would your emotional state be if the dog kills your cat.

  • keerok
    Lv 7
    10 months ago

    She's not being selfish. You share the room. If you get a pet, she'll have to deal with it too. She doesn't want that and it's actually a good thing she made that clear to you.

    If you're desperate on having a kitten, go get yourself your own room!

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