I am gay. Should I tell my parents?
I am 26 years old, male. I don't live with my parents anymore as I got a resident position offer in NYC.
I am 1st year resident physician in Pediatrics. I have never had a boyfriend or girlfriend I think they might know I am gay. The main problem is that my parents are quite conservative and I think they will not accept me as how I am.
I actually don't plan to marry. I just want to perhaps be a foster parent, nothing else. What would you do in my situation?
- Anonymous5 months agoFavorite Answer
I would Since you are on your own and paying your own bills. Coming out is how we teach others about us. Its how we are gaining more respect and rights around the world. Its is your duty. Your folks have to know that if they are homophobic- they go against their own flesh and blood. And keep the dialogue open. They may cut you for a few days or even a few years. Always be ready to educate. By you living a good life - you show that lgbt are not the terrible people trolls portray us to be. We are real people with careers, families and parts of the community. If you won’t teach them - who else will?
Also - lgbt have always been having kids. Meet lgbt families - do things like attend functions at the lgbt center or maybe try a pro lgbt church or meditation circle. Many gay men hire surrogates or work deals out with friends or maybe your partner might have a sister willing to donate an egg - or yeah - you can be a foster parent. But thats part of why we fought for gay marriage!
- TjLv 75 months ago
There is no need to tell them. You can also adopt or foster a child in NY with no problem.
- reme_1Lv 75 months ago
It is about time. You might want to get some info from PFLAG.org- a wonderful support group of mostly parents with)LGBT kids
- 5 months ago
Here is the problem:
Often "acceptance" is used interchangeably with "approval".
Who you are is not subject to any one else's acceptance except you.
As for approval, a person can accept something or some one as it is and still not approve.
So be prepared for them to accept the circumstances but not approve of it.
If you want their approval (or Gods) then it would seem celibacy is in order.
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- A.J.Lv 75 months ago
I did not come out to my parents officially for many years, and they are accepting and I have a openly gay cousin. However, it was an open secret. They never saw me with a girlfriend and I was already in my 40's. When I told them, they didn't treat me any differently. They accepted that my sexuality only affects about biological children and gender of in-laws if I marry. It is important to have personal integrity and honesty. If they ask, you tell them very carefully. They should already suspect. The other option is finding a common relative or friend that is more accepting and tell them first and work your way through the friends and relatives so by the time you tell them, they already know and blame them for you not telling them first.
- MarkLv 75 months ago
Ťhėrė is no reason they should know
apart from them being yur parnts but
if they'r highly religious it's best nôť ťô.