Please please help!?
I’m 18 years old, I live with my father, he claims benefits as he owes not work due to being disabled. He will not let me go into work as it will effect his benefits and he will be homeless as he says! I am also pregnant, I have not mentioned this to him as I know he will probably kick me out! I want to earn money and work. I am not in education anymore due to me not liking it in college, which has stopped his hold benefits. It’s so stressing as I want to earn money but he won’t let me!
- Anonymous10 months ago
If you intend to have the child and keep it, you are going to need to have a job. You cannot count on the *sshole who knocked you up. And you aren't going to be making any more than minimum wage so you will struggle terribly just to support yourself and your child. Don't expect government assistance. You will have a responsibility to file for child support from the father of the child. That costs money - thousands upon thousands of dollars to hire a lawyer and get it done. Consider aborting it, if it not too late. And you are right, he will probably kick you out. Why should he take on the responsibility and liability of "your" child. Your child would be "your" responsibility to feed and look after, not his. He likely wants his privacy and quiet, peaceful time, which is not going to happen with a young child in the house. I don't see how you can keep this child. I just can't see it.
- PamLv 610 months ago
I don't wanna judge you but WHY would you go get yourself knocked up at 18? You are setting yourself and your kid up for a lifetime of poverty. You will likely end up on social services because caring for a baby is not cheap! As an 18 year old, you are able to make your own decisions whether to work or not. Your father can't control you for ever. But now your role will be as a "baby mama" and "teenage mom". Not smart. Good luck with that.
- Casey YLv 710 months ago
Your income will not affect his disability, but there are other benefits it might affect.
- Beverly SLv 710 months ago
You are 18 & if he is on disability your income does not affect what he gets.
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- JayLv 610 months ago
Go to Family and Child Services and speak with a social worker. Tell that person everything. They will find a program that will assist you.
- AmbistomaLv 710 months ago
Your baby-daddy needs to step up. If he won't, his family might.
- MaxiLv 710 months ago
So what are you going to do? You are an adult who is not working and not studying,single and pregnant and living with your father who is financially controlling you so he is OK!
You are responsible for you and now a baby, so what is the plan, stay with daddy, do as you are told and try to hide a pregnancy and live off benefits and child support?
You are not responsible for your dad or providing him with a benefit lifestyle........ and now you are pregnant you need to tell him and sooner rather than later, you need to either go back to college and DO something that can earn you money, be it a short beauty therapy course or something like book keeping, at least you will then have the means to earn money from home being self employed doing nails/facials or book keeping for small businesses and many colleges have creches so you can carry on studying so you get more than a basic education even when the baby is born... your responsibility is ONLY to yourself.
In so far as the bf from when the kid is born needs to pay child support and if your controllig dad tells you to leave you will also need to find somewhere to rent........ getting pregnant just made your life 1000 times harder
- 10 months ago
If you are 18 it is time you left home. Your father can continue to be able to have his nose in the benefits trough. Leaving will not make him homeless.
But you have enormously complicated this by getting pregnant. You will first have to decide what you are going to do about that. You have three possible choices; abortion, adoption or keep the child. Which you decide will depend on what works best for you and bf who is just as entitled to a say in this as you are. If he wants to get married and support you both, that is great. If he is not interested in making this a permanent relationship, you will have to consider one of the other two options, neither of which are great but both better than a lifetime of benefit dependency which is what you are facing with just GCSEs.
I'm sorry this happened to you. My mother got pregnant at the age of 18 and took the brave decision to put me up for adoption. She and my father later married and had three more children and a great life. That would not have happened if she had kept me.
- MandyLv 610 months ago
Why would you get pregnant when you have no job, live at home and didn’t even complete your degree?