I've been invited to 3 upcoming weddings but I don't want to waste vacations. Is it wrong to use them on my own vacation istead?

BAsically these "used" to be my best friends but we have been in and out of each other's lives the past few years, and basically I am old enough to understand now that they sent out wedding invitations to myself as well as my family in order to guilt trip me into going. However, that's not working... show more BAsically these "used" to be my best friends but we have been in and out of each other's lives the past few years, and basically I am old enough to understand now that they sent out wedding invitations to myself as well as my family in order to guilt trip me into going. However, that's not working on me. I do not want to be used for an expensive wedding gift when I can barely afford gifts for myself.

Before you answer "It's fine not to go to your friend's weddings if you don't plan on them coming to yours". I am not getting married nor do I enjoy relationships. I like being single and I plan on keeping that way. When I explained all this to my family that they are just being used as a guilt trip they were shocked that I'd even think this about my "best friend's since high school?"

If that's the case, where were these friends when they stopped getting together with me when their relationships became serious? Where were they when I went back to college for a career change and graduated? Did they even send me a simple happy birthday text this year? No, they did not. So why should I waste my vacation time on their wedding and my hard earned money on a gift from their registry? I'm just so sick of this wedding crap and having people throw it into my face.

Throughout my life I've always been #2 or 3 on people's list, including my own family. So why am I suddenly selfish for suddenly realizing that the only person who is going to place me #1 is myself?
Update: Why would I be jealous of weddings when I don't want one of my own? That doesn't make sense. I think you just read what you want to read.
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