Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingParenting · 3 months ago

I don't approve of my son's girlfriend. Help?

My 15 year old son recently has started going with a girl who I do not approve of. As much a I want to say that I'm not a judgmental person, her look is a bit much for even me --- bright blue hair, facial piercings, fishnet stockings, etc... not the kind of girl I would've picked for my son.

The one time I spoke to her she was sweet and a little shy, but I can't imagine why a girl who was actually friendly and shy would choose such an "out there" look. I can't help but worry that what I'm seeing of her is just an act.

I've brought it up to my son, but every time I do, he snaps at me and won't give me a straight answer. I don't want to make him feel bad or ruin his relationship, but I'm very worried about the company he's keeping. What should I do?

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  • GEEGEE
    Lv 7
    3 months ago

    He HAS given you a straight answer, by snapping at you and continuing to see her. Unfortunately you don't get to choose his SO. You admit she is nice and even a bit shy. Her "out there" look might be an attempt to appear to be more up front than she feels. I'd be inclined to take a step back and just realize, at 15, he, and she, will likely change and grow before high school ends.

  • 3 months ago

    Of course your son snapped at you, you literally judged his girlfriend by her appearance. As for what you should do, leave his relationship alone. He's 15 so their relationship probably isn't going to last long anyway. However don't forbid him from seeing her though because that's going to ruin any relationship that you have with him so this is not worth making a battle over.

  • 3 months ago

    If you get to know her I am sure you will like her and if your son is happy with her then I am sure you should be happy for him. He is 15 he needs to make his own mistakes

  • 3 months ago

    its whats on the inside that matters so unless your sons new girlfriend does something wrong then you should stop worrying.

    • John P
      Lv 7
      3 months agoReport

      The major fact is that your son is 15. At that sort of age most youngsters associate with all sorts of people, some of whom might be "unsuitable. At 15 it is unlikely that he is choosing a partner/wife for life.

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  • edward
    Lv 7
    3 months ago

    I had a friend similar to that except outlandish hair was against the uniform so she kept her hair brown. During off hours from school or casual days she wore usually a corset or bustier, fishnet stockings, 4 inch heels, miniskirt and some sort of cardigan. She had a reputation around school though (although she had a boyfriend who when she is dating she’s monogamous), for being a slut. Maybe your son wants to have sex. The girls like that were all sweet to my mother, the guys i knew were sweet to my mother, to be honest, your son has friends and they are all different around you than they are with him. His girlfriend may be a slut but seem sweet to you

    • edward
      Lv 7
      3 months agoReport

      Not what i meant. When she was single she’s available to sleep with anyone. I did mention it was when she was dating

  • Anonymous
    3 months ago

    "Not the kind of girl I would've picked for my son."

    Unless you live in India, you're not supposed to "pick" girls for your son. You not wanting him to be with her will make him want her more. If they're dating, they obviously have more in common than you think.

    Leave them alone. It's not like they're going to get married.

  • 3 months ago

    This is where you do nothing. The more you fuss about her looks, the more you'll push your son at her. Instead, get to know her. Become her best friend. Either you'll see that she's fine (maybe she doesn't have guidance at home), or the fact that you embrace her will push your son away from her, as he may have picked her to rebel against you.

  • Cammie
    Lv 7
    3 months ago

    He is 15 ! he is not going to marry this colorful girl.Get to know her.She may very well be a good influence on your son.Talk to him about birth control and safe sex.Invite her to dinner.

  • 3 months ago

    Remember the old adage that you can't judge a book by its cover.

  • Eva
    Lv 4
    3 months ago

    Stay out of it. The more you interfere, the more determined he will be to keep seeing her.

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