Why doesn’t my husband want a divorce anymore?
I am a Muslim and I came to the USA from Iraq in 2002, as an immigrant. My husband was born and raised in the USA. He belongs to a rich family. He is highly educated, good looking, and arrogant. I am belong to a middle class family. I am not highly educated because my family couldn't afford to send me to college. I am just a high school graduate. My father-in-law, who is deceased now suffered from cancer. He was a very nice man. He asked my parents for my hand in marriage, for his son. My parents agreed. Thinking that my husband is rich, highly educated, and good looking, they said yes. My parents thought they are making the right decision for me.
But my husband used to look down upon me. He used to tell me that after he father dies, he will divorce me! I didn't know what to do? I didn't tell anyone anything. Despite everything, I did everything for my husband and his ailing father. I cook, do laundry and clean the house because that is all I can do. My husband and I never had sex! I never cheated on my husband but I am not sure about him! Since, my father-in-law has passed away, my husband has completely changed! He is so much nicer and caring now! He says, I don't want a divorce anymore! He says, he wants to remain married to me because he loves me. Why has he changed his decision? He is asking me to give him a chance. Why did he change his decision?
- chris nLv 76 months ago
Instead of wondering about his motives, you must think about what YOU want. Do you want a divorce from him in this sexless marriage? If you are still a virgin it can be proved by a doctor if you wished to divorce your husband or annul the marriage. Whatever you decide to do, I think you should seek legal advice to find out just where you stand legally in this matter. You sound like an unpaid housekeeper and nurse. Perhaps your husband doesn't want to lose that. Perhaps he now finds he cares for you or is lonely since his father died. He may change his mind again and want a divorce again. Perhaps his father has left YOU all his money and your husband doesn't wish to lose that. Get some legal advice.
- branddxbLv 76 months ago
What do YOU. Want ? If you want a divorce then get one.
- 6 months ago
your husband may have finally realized what a gem he has in a devout Muslim wife. It took awhile for me to accept my good fortune with mine, but I know now that I am a blessed husband.
- MikeyLv 76 months ago
The only person who is going to know is your husband. I just wonder, after being treated so poorly, why you didn't do the divorcing.
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- Lil'AlienLv 76 months ago
It's possible your husband resented his father for arranging his marriage because he thought that being born in America would give him the freedom to marry who he wanted. Instead his father arrange the marriage for him and it's possible your husband took his displeasure of that decision out on you.
His father's death could have made him realise that the marriage he has isn't as bad as he thought. Or that you are a much better match than he previously thought. It's also possible now that the person who he was so angry with has died, the anger about the marriage died with it.
You should ask your husband about it and maybe you should also insist you improve your education and become more of an independent woman. In that case, if he changes his mind again, you will be able to provide for yourself and are not dependant on him or any support he might offer you. He treated you badly for a long time and it's totally understandable you don't want to be married to him anymore because of it. So think about your options here and then see what is the best thing for you to do.