no asked in Social ScienceGender Studies · 5 months ago

Why do women expect MAN to pay on 1st date?

I’m a 25 year old woman. Working on my masters and have a great job.

As a modern woman, it astounds me that lots of my female friends said they would not go on 2nd date with woman if he did not pay for first date. Really? What century are we living in?

I mean 60 years ago, it was understandable as women did not have jobs. Therefore, men had to pay. However women have exact same opportunities that are provided for men. And I think the unemployment rate for women is actually lower. Believe it or not, the number of female breadwinners for families is growing very fast in the country. Meaning more and more women are getting jobs where they have higher salary than their hubby

So why do women expect men to pay? Isn’t this very outdated idea?

85 Answers

  • Bill
    Lv 7
    5 months ago
    Best answer

    Career women are just weird. Women expect men to pay for the meal because it shows a willingness to provide and makes the woman feel cared for.

    Btw, most women that are breadwinners are single mothers.

    Also, sixty years ago many women had part time jobs.

    Fun fact though, even most feminist women prefer men that pay for the first date and are chivalrous. Why do you think that is? Why do you think the women that claim to be against all that stuff still prefer it more times than not? These women even call that kind of behavior benevolent sexism and yet in studies they still prefer the guys that do it.

    Feminists tried their best to get men to prefer career women and yet they failed to do it. Feminists tried their best to get women to hate chivalry and yet they failed to do it. The only thing they really managed to do was force women in the workplace by lowering the wages of men.

  • 5 months ago

    Sex. Money. Lower chakras. Lots of women in this country see everything in this life in purely materialistic terms. Relationships, dating, marriage, etc. A lot of women won’t even get involved with a man who has no money. Or they will have children with a man who has some, expect him to marry them, then get a no-fault divorce when they ‘re bored with him and take everything he has, and not even let him see his children. Like the Madonna song says: “We are living in a material world, and I am a material girl”. My ex-wife stole over 40k in social security benefits from our son. Then when he was 17 she kicked him out of her house because hubby #4, who abused him for years, didn’t like his presence there. Many of us men have seen our lives and children destroyed by women who care only about money. My son hates me for bringing him into this life with that kind of mother. I once horribly said in front of my son that I felt like killing myself and he said that we should both kill ourselves.

  • 5 months ago

    Gender roles ingrained in society...

  • 5 months ago

    I knew my girlfriend was the one for me when she dropped $150 on a king crab dinner and didn't allow me to put money in.

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  • 5 months ago

    Bc its the traditional thing to do.. very gentleman-like.. like i paid for my husbands food when dating.. but first date he paid.. like geeze whats so wrong with a man being a gentleman..

    • 5 months agoReport

      You only want tradition when it benefits you.

  • 5 months ago

    It is a matter of respect. A man should ACT like a man and always pay, open doors for women and respect them.

    • fdf5 months agoReport

      divorces at alarming rates , enjoyed cooking for their families etc but I guess a man expecting any of that from a woman is a " woman hater " male chauvinist" " bigot " etc yet it's perfectly fine for women to expect men to pay for dates , open doors for them , treat them like princesses etc

  • 5 months ago

    Yes it is an outdated idea, but just as feminism is taking time to grow, old habits take a long time to die. It's not just women expecting men to pay. There are still courteous men who want to pay and, if you have offered your half, or to foot the bill and he insists, you'd be on the rude and ungrateful side not to allow him to do so. We have hundreds of years of this half and half society again. I'm sure you may have noticed with regard to other change, that you cannot do it in a worthwhile way overnight. And neither should feminists force change on those who do not wish to change.

    • fdf5 months agoReport

      Now I'm a logical person ( not a hypocrite) I think the man should certainly pay for the date or open doors for her or be the provider but I'm also a " monster " because I happen to believe that women should be virgins until marriage , be nurturers instead of aborting children , dress modestly etc

  • 5 months ago

    If you want a real woman, you have to be a man. You dont sound like a real woman to me, youre probably a lesbian

    • Mr. Wizard
      Lv 7
      5 months agoReport

      Hey now!! I know a couple of REAL LESBIANS who bicker-dicker ( uh....pun intended there ) with LOADS of melodrama over this very dating tradition issue; quite funny to sit back and watch.

  • 5 months ago

    I'm a woman and I try to convince my dates to split the payment, but they always insist on treating ladies. You're right that women now have jobs and their own income. I guess some people have a view that women don't have to be overly independent and can still be treated in an old-fashioned way.

    I gotta admit I feel bad when my date pays. Makes me feel like a free loader.

  • Dr. D
    Lv 7
    5 months ago

    When a woman is looking for a potential long-term relationship there are three qualities they look for in a man. They want a man who will love, protect and respect them.

    Love is expressed as (1) words of affection, (2) quality time, (3) gifts, (4) works of service, and (5) physical touch.

    Protection is found through (1) physical protection, (2) fiscal protection and (3) emotional protection (security).

    Respect is probably the most difficult for a man to give a woman. He shows respect for a woman through communication, understanding and having shared values with her.

    Women expect a man to pay on the 1st date when her fiscal security is more dependent upon the man's wealth (income), than her own. If she is financially independent then it isn't an issue for her.

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