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Have I failed as a friend?

A couple months back, my best friend came out to me as bisexual. I supported her unconditionally and tried to help her as much as I could. I listened to her worries and tried to give her the best advise.

Recently however, she has turned to the LGBTQ+ community forums. She didn t tell me why and I didn t ask but I have a feeling that it s because she doesn t think I understand her as I am not part of the LGBTQ+ community. We had a bit of an argument where she said that I always tell her that everything is going to be okay however I don t understand the severity of her situation. She told me that I should do some research about this topic before I say it will be okay. We made up but I cant help but think about what she said.

Any bisexual members of the LGBTQ+ community please help me understand what she s going through and please tell me if I have failed in the role of a best friend.

3 Answers

  • 10 months ago

    she is like many people ,, mad at the world trying to find a place that will make all her dreams come true

    you can be friends ,, does not mean you hang out anymore if she is looking for an area to be that makes you uncomfortable

    you are concerned about her and her feelings ,, is she equally concerned about you?

    friendship is a two way street and if she is on a one way street there are no room for friends there just movement

    I have great friends I have not seen for decades,, they are still friends just in another world, state etc

    you are not your brother keeper

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  • 10 months ago

    You have not failed as a friend. Friends do their best even if they truly don't understand the situation. Your friend is most likely in the same boat of not fully understanding, which is why she is searching for people like her that may have some insight and advice for overcoming some of the problems she may be having. The main problem is everyone is an individual, where even as a straight white guy, I hear straight men complaining about their difficulties on the dating scene when I had none, so I cannot necessarily relate to their problem. Likewise with your bisexual friend, she most likely has unique problems that other bisexuals cannot necessarily relate to. All you can do is listen, maybe do some research of your own to help her find a resolution with the possibility that there is no resolution. Sometimes, especially with women, they don't want help, they just want someone to listen so that they can voice their concerns out loud to someone. Being a guy who always wants to fix problems in a house full of women, it took a while for this lesson to sink in.

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  • 10 months ago

    NO U HAVE NOT but she is now entering a different world so it might be best to let her go and find friends more like yourself.

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