What are my options in dealing with this problem?
My sister is 37 years old, has a job, a cashed off house, a £15k car and a massive annual salary. But she refuses to move out of our parents home. She spends most of the week at work, but when she is home, she lies on her bed and reads for hours on end. Whenever my mum asks her to do something, it comes with a barrage of shouting. I'm not as settled as her and struggling living in this environment - moving out would clear my savings and I'd end up renting forever. My dad protects my sister - I think because she is the only one who doesnt question him. I call him out on his BS, so we have a very superficial relationship.
My sister is not a clean person either - she leaves a mess in the family bathroom, her room stinks and her personal hygiene leaves a lot to be desired. She's a nice person when she wants to be, but that isnt very often at all.
What would you do in this situation?
- Anonymous5 months agoBest answer
If it helps, I see so many questions in here like this! Parents aren't requiring an adult child to grow up, and another adult "child" living in the home wants to know what to do. Sadly, the answer is always the same: move out or stop complaining.
That sounds harsh, but it isn't. It's reality. I don't get why your parents aren't forcing the issue, but it's their home and they can run it however they want, including some strange decision making. So this is really a black and white issue. Your choice is to stay and accept the weirdness, or move out.
You don't want to move out because it will mess with your finances. This is understandable. But it also means you're indirectly saying that owning a home in the near future is more important to you than where you live NOW and what you're going through. So you're living at home by choice. That means when you complain, you're complaining about your own decisions.
- 5 months ago
- Anonymous5 months ago
They should demand that she pay them rent, help to clean the house and help out during chores around the house, keep her room and bathroom clean, help cook dinner, etc.
- momLv 75 months ago
you may not have a choice but too move out. your sister sounds like a spoiled person and gets away with everything
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- babyboomer1001Lv 75 months ago
She has as much right to live there as you do. Stay out of her room and you won't have to look at or smell her mess. It's really none of your business how she chooses to live and if she reads all the time and doesn't do much else, it's her business. It could be a lot worse - drinking, drugs. Since when is reading a bad thing?
- oklatomLv 75 months ago
Two options. Stay there if you wish but hush up and stay out of it.
Option 2, move out.
- SlumlordLv 75 months ago
Move out or deal with it. Don't really see a 3rd option here because she isn't going anywhere anytime soon.
- Anonymous5 months ago
You both are adults so you should cut the apron strings ...move out be independent adults already.
- PearlLv 75 months ago
the only thing you can do is rnove out
- TealLv 75 months ago
Mind your own business and do what you need to do to move out. Your parents don't have a problem with the way your sister lives, you know you won't get any help from them. You also know that appealing to her directly isn't going to make much of a difference since she knows they are on her side. Avoid conflict with her and focus on yourself. When you are out of the house and on your own, you can be critical and demanding as you want. You have no leverage in the meantime.