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What to do about a husband that cheats and you want a second chance?

I know a friend that s been married for 25 yrs. Her husband has been cheating on her for over a year with the same woman. He told her at Christmas that he wasnt happy and didn t want to be married anymore. Well come to find out he still talks and see this woman everyday. My friend told him to give her a 2nd chance and she wants to change some things... Like going off with him, helping with the bills, etc... But he can t give her a definite answer on a 2nd chance. Shes been asking for almost 4 months. They haven t slept together in over a year, they don t do anything together except family functions. Should she keep trying or just be the bigger woman and walk away??

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  • 1 year ago
    Favourite answer

    You can't try and fix a marriage when 1 person has got the other cheek turned toward someone else. He doesn't want to give her another chance, he wants to be with the person on the side. She isn't going to reach him at this point and it's just wasting time when he himself doesn't care and isn't trying anymore. She should just leave. Learn from her mistakes and start over with someone else.

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  • Tara
    Lv 7
    1 year ago

    It sounds like he doesn't want to give a 2nd chance.

    If he doesn't want her - then it's HER decision if she wants to stay there trying with a man who does not want her.

    She knows he's a cheater … she could do better if she wanted to.

    It's all about what SHE wants to put up with.

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  • 1 year ago

    It can be fixed! It'll take a lot of hard work and dedication from both of you but I'm sure that it is worth it as long as your mental and physical health isn't on the line. Marriage has a lot of trials, I'm not married myself but I've witnessed numerous couple form a healthier relationship after infidelity and even an outside child. Good luck!

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  • SW-6
    Lv 6
    1 year ago

    "A man is going to treat you the way you let him". That said, i cant see why she needs a 2nd chance to be treated like XXXX, and another excuse for her husband to decide she is ok with being walked all over, so I will keep doing it. So while he is out enjoying his life and having the time of his life, she is sitting home, worried, wondering, obsessing, etc. Gurl please. Life is short. Why waste it on a man who has no respect for you and will treat you like hot mess? Are there not a gazillion other men out there who will do right by you while you are letting this one treat you so bad? You are a more forgiving than me honey. The way I see it is if I can work all day, come home to clean for you, cook for you, be there for you, love you, be loyal to you, respect you - then you better do the same for me. IF you can't then you know where to go and I can tell you how to get there. Honey, If he can find another woman to put up with his raggedy S, then you can find a man who knows how to treat a woman. If this were me, I am gone and he can kiss my behind. Harsh I know, but we all deserve better. I was married to this same kind of man who took such advantage of my good nature because I let him. Don't you settle for less than you deserve honey. Think about this real hard and ask yourself if your life is as good as it can be. Good luck to you :)

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  • 1 year ago

    Well, regardless what she wants, if her husband is no longer interested in being married, he should divorce her. The reason why he is still with her is because he is trying to protect his assets.

    Time for her to seek counseling so she can learn how to walk away from a guy who left the marriage over a year ago. Unless he wants to work things out, there really is no point in her even trying because it takes TWO people to be committed to a marriage. Her husband has a foot out of the door already.

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  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    At this point the marriage will never be the same if he won't listen to reason , get a divorce

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  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    After 25 years of marriage, it's pretty common for sex to become rather routine and the excitement is not there now. This is how open relationships sometime get started. Maybe you should do a little looking around for a little dick on the side too. I bet you would love it.

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  • Grace
    Lv 5
    1 year ago

    Talking to a counselor might help and do not trust all on here because some are not kind.

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  • 1 year ago

    Run, do not walk away.

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  • Teal
    Lv 7
    1 year ago

    He should not have to leave her for her to realize their relationship was in bad shape. It's too little, too late. He is also the one who chose to have an affair and drag things out for an entire year instead of respecting her enough to end it. He has no interest in making things better and he fell out of love with her a long time ago. He lied to her and used her, then traded her in for a better deal. This should make her angry. She needs to stop groveling like a kicked puppy and walk away with her dignity.

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