Critique my writing (link)?

(please follow the link) https://docs.google.com/document/d/1aofJdjqnpjalOJLeeS7VdauVxxvjUaXqzi5hK_fCR3w/edit?usp=sharing Exerpt: "Swim with me," she insisted, slowly pulling his dazed form over the edge of the rock and into the water. As soon as he hit the cold surface, he panicked, kicking and... show more (please follow the link)

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1aofJdjqnpjalOJLeeS7VdauVxxvjUaXqzi5hK_fCR3w/edit?usp=sharing
Exerpt:
"Swim with me," she insisted, slowly pulling his dazed form over the edge of the rock and into the water.
As soon as he hit the cold surface, he panicked, kicking and scrambling for the fragile safety of land.
"Shhh, shh," the siren soothed, drawing him dangerously close, keeping him above water with her tail coiled around his waist. He went still. She grinned. "I don t bite."
He swallowed. "Somehow I doubt that," he managed hoarsely.
She laughed and it almost sounded like the angelic ring of wind chimes. "I quite like you, Captain, especially like this. Dizzy, desperate, enchanted one might say. It s cute."
Fear temporarily numbed by his hunger, he responded, "I have a feeling I d be much cuter at the wheel of my ship. Killing me would definitely take all the cuteness away."
She laughed again. "Bold and charming. Tell me, Captain, do you think if I lured your men and their ship against the rocks you would stop worrying about them?"
He stared at her. "What? No, don t–"
"Is that an order, Captain?" Her eyes flickered in amusement.
"N-No, I...."
"Perhaps you d like to rephrase." She traced the sensitive lines of his jaw and throat, humming again, more quietly this time.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1aofJdjqnpjalOJLeeS7VdauVxxvjUaXqzi5hK_fCR3w/edit?usp=sharing
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