promotion image of download ymail app
Lv 4
Jan asked in Arts & HumanitiesBooks & Authors · 1 year ago

Help reword this to sound better. "There on a boat sat Jerry and a blonde, was this Candice? did he settle for her out of hurt?"?

4 Answers

  • 1 year ago
    Favourite answer

    There on a boat sat Jerry with a blonde. Was this Candice? Had Jerry settled for her after his previous hurt?

    • Commenter avatarLog in to reply to the answers
  • 1 year ago

    That’s ..pretty awful man. Is this homework? Have you learned descriptive writing yet? Is this A ship? Row boat? Are they out at sea, on a lake, in a river? How’s the weather? Is it day or night? Does Jerry know how he got there? You literally have NO DETAILS!

    Example piece:

    The water slapped steadily against the hull of their little row boat sounding like a hollow war drum. Stars, reflected on its unsteady surface, added to the ambient lighting of the full moon. Even the fireflies dancing on the cool breeze couldn’t detract from the scene before him.

    Jerry shifted uncomfortably causing the boat to rock. The girl before him blushed and tucked a silken strand of golden hair behind her ear. He had always thought of her as beautiful, but were these feelings real or was he just on the rebound, trying to recapture what he had lost before his heart had been broken into a million excuses as to why he should run away while he still could.

    • Commenter avatarLog in to reply to the answers
  • 1 year ago

    Did Jerry settle for a blonde who he thought to be Candice, out of hurt.

    • Commenter avatarLog in to reply to the answers
  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    "A blonde, presumed to be named Candice, sat with Jerry a boat.

    Had he selected her, because of his inner pain of loneliness?"

    a blond is a fair-haired male, and

    a blonde is a fair-haired female.

    • ...Show all comments
    • Speed
      Lv 7
      1 year agoReport

      Actually, "blonde" is reserved for use as an adjective applied to females. Noun? Nope. At least that's what I learned in the Stone Age.

    • Commenter avatarLog in to reply to the answers
Still have questions? Get answers by asking now.