I am very upset that I will never be with this woman?

This woman and I have been lifelong friends, since both our parents were friends with each other. When both of us were small children, we were completely inseparable. Me and her did everything together like playing sports together, watching movies together, and sleeping right next to each other whenever we had a... show more This woman and I have been lifelong friends, since both our parents were friends with each other. When both of us were small children, we were completely inseparable. Me and her did everything together like playing sports together, watching movies together, and sleeping right next to each other whenever we had a sleepover.

When we were 10 years old, I started developing romantic feelings for her, and I was hoping one day that we would get married to each other. When we were kids, adults used to tease us that we would get married someday, and so I was certain that we would get married someday. Another reason why I was so certain about that too is because I watched a lot of movies like The Lion King and Happy Feet and the Harry Potter series where 2 childhood friends become more than friends later on in their life, and so I thought that was going to happen with me and my friend.

However I was too nervous and shy to let her know my feelings about her, and when we got into high school, she started dating other boys, and I got really upset and jealous about that.

When we both become 18 years old, I finally let her know about my feelings about her, and she said that she never felt that way about me. I was and am still devastated about that, since it was my long life dream to be with her, and that will never happen. To matters worse, I never kissed a girl, since I was saving my first kiss for her. She has a boyfriend now, and she's happy with him. But I'm not happy at all.
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