How do I resist these food cravings?

I'm 5'9 in height and last time I checked (which was yesterday) I weighed 128. Last night I went to this pool party at my aunt's. I ate a decent breakfast, cream of wheat, no added sugar or butter, with half a banana, and water. Then I worked out for a bit and for lunch I arrived at my aunt's... show more I'm 5'9 in height and last time I checked (which was yesterday) I weighed 128.

Last night I went to this pool party at my aunt's. I ate a decent breakfast, cream of wheat, no added sugar or butter, with half a banana, and water. Then I worked out for a bit and for lunch I arrived at my aunt's and snacked on some cherry tomatoes while drinking water, then I swam for the rest of the day. Now... I constantly kept telling myself I'm not going to binge or pig out at this party, cause usually I pig out at parties, and I was doing such a good job at not eating anything for once... Then...once dinner came... I lost it.

My aunt made Italian beef, Ham, fruit salad with marshmallows, and had all these toppings like cheese and blah blah. No one at the party ate at the same time either, it was like a buffet. Now, I took a little bit of everything, and after I finished my plate, I still felt a tiny bit hungry. So, I thought I should have seconds, and that is when everything went downhill.

I had seconds and then I kept on eating the fruit salad, which was something I wanted to avoid because of the sugar in the marsh mellows, which I avoided the marsh mellows, but the fruit was still addicting. And I kept on pigging out with the ham and ugh...after that I tried to work it off by going swimming..but of course I forgot about dessert... and my aunt gave me this HUGE piece of turtle pie while she gave everyone these tiny pieces. I wanted to cry. I know she told me I don't have to eat all of it... but sometimes I just have no self control... and I ate the entire thing... The worst part was I was totally bloated and whenever I eat I always see my stomach expand and I HATE it.

Then, that night, I had to go to my grandma's...and I did 2,300 jumping jacks to work it off, which I worked off most of it.

I work out constantly everyday and lost 32 pounds this year and everyone is always saying how skinny I am and I feel like I'm trapped in a cage and I always feel under pressure to be always skinny now. I used to have a eating disorder, kind of, I didn't puke out food or anything, I just ate very little, and my body went into starvation mode a couple times, but I've recovered from that but still struggle with trying to lose weight. Anyways...

I'm at my Grandma's now and I have no idea how much I weigh, and its killing me since my Grandma always, ALWAYS makes these huge meals. I just had breakfast which was, scrambled eggs, a peach, tangerines, half a banana, four sausages, water, and sigh... a tiny piece of coffee cake. Its kind of too much of what I usually eat, but last night was WAY worse. I just did 1,500 jumping jacks to work that off though... Planning to do more after typing this...

Anyways... I feel so stressed. I'll probably have a yogurt for lunch or something, but I hope its low in sugar. I've been avoiding sugar lately and I've lost like 4 pounds this week. But now since I'm at my Grandma's, which she has dessert everywhere, I don't know how I'm going to fare... She ALWAYS makes me these big dinners too, which I'm scared for tonight... And she makes me feel guilty if I don't have seconds and she is of course going to offer me these desserts after. Then she gives me these speeches saying its okay to have desserts once in awhile and blah blah. But I'm probably staying at her house for two days...and one time I stayed at her house for 4 days and I gained like 5 pounds.. I don't want that.. So, do you guys have any tips on how to not binge tonight or to at least resist these food temptations/cravings? I've tried eating slowly, which works for me sometimes but..sigh...and I always have these voices in my head saying "its not worth it! Don't eat it!" but I continue to eat it anyways, and sometimes I continue to eat when I'm full. I want serious answers please, thank you so much for taking the time to read this, and sorry its so long.
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