Many issues. 1. It is possible that she is annoying others and is not aware of it, we all do things, (even you and me) that annoy other people. It might benefit you to tell her she is annoying you, she can't fix a problem she is not aware of. In life, if someone is doing something wrong, you have to tell them they are doing wrong, and then give them a chance to correct it. 2. Being quiet is not a crime. It is possible that she has known your other housemate longer, or maybe for some reason has more in common with that person, so she feels more comfortable talking to that person, than she does talking to you. It almost makes me wonder if for some reason you remind her of someone who hurt her. Since you mention you seem to be making her nervous, or she retreats when you think you are having a good time, that might suggest to me that something you are saying or doing offends her, or that maybe you remind her of a person who hurt her. 3. Maybe her mother never taught her to cook, maybe she is not a good cook. Just because you are a female, doesn't mean you know how to cook, or that you are a good cook, or that you like to cook. Well maybe you all need to have a house meeting and go over the rules of the house again. Maybe you need to have a schedule and it rotates. So maybe each person takes a turn cleaning the bathroom, each person takes a turn doing cooking, each person takes a turn doing the dishes. If you don't want to do your turn with the cooking, you can trade with someone else. When I was in Basic Training in the Air Force, we had chores to do also, but we traded chores with each other. I shined other girls boots and other girls did my ironing, and other girls cleaned the bathrooms, we just traded chores so we could to the chores we wanted to do, and didn't have to do the chores we didn't want to do. Maybe since she has a job, she could pay someone else to do her turn at the chores. It is possible that her mother never showed her how to clean a toilet. I can tell you I have met a lot of people in my life who don't know how to clean a toilet. Maybe you all need to show her how to clean a house. I wonder if she came from an abusive home, it sounds like it. Have a house meeting, ask her for solutions so she doesn't feel like you all are ganging up on her. Come up with a schedule, come up with a plan, come up with a solution, but be careful that she doesn't think you all are attacking her. Ask her for the solutions so you don't all have to live in a dirty house. If you come up with a schedule and she still doesn't do her share, it might be best to find another roommate. I would like to say......having lived with my share of roommates. I would rather clean up after a messy roommate, than deal with a roommate that drinks and has tons of boyfriends sleeping over and the boyfriend and his friends eat all the food I buy. Sometimes you have to learn to pick your battles. I would rather clean up the toilet and clean up the dishes if she is a quiet person, it sounds like that would be a better deal. Your next roommate might be a nightmare, so be careful.