Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 10 years ago

I'm confused: don't really have friends?

I do have friends, but none of them are close. And none of them are close because I wanted it that way, and so I sort of distanced myself from everyone. There's still those people I can hang out with, but most break and lunch times I go to the library. I am completely fine with my own company. In fact, I love it. I have maladaptive daydreaming, so I'm never bored.

But yesterday, I hung out with a friend of mine, and she kept making reference to all these things she did with her friends, and all the different people she was friends with, and I felt sort of wistful, because I don't have that. I haven't had that in a long time. And I told her about it, about how I felt like I wanted more closer friends to do things with, and she said that maybe I just have to start out slowly, and stop hanging out in the library so much.

But the thing is, yesterday, I wanted friends. Now, I really don't mind. Because when I'm with a group of people, I kind of wish that I wasn't there. But then, very occasionally (very, very occasionally) I get wistful and wish for closer friends. They seem so great, the way you can tell them everything and laugh together and share memories. The way you feel when you're around them.

But I...I don't feel like other people do when I'm around my friends. Don't get me wrong, they're lovely people, but my maladaptive daydreaming (maladaptive daydreaming is a disorder where one daydreams excessively to the point where social interaction seems like a chore) doesn't let me feel like that. It makes me want to be on my own and just think or read or write.

But I really want to feel like others do around their friends. Please help. Thanks in advance.

Update:

No, the ellipse is for hesitation. I write how I would speak, dumbcuuunt.

4 Answers

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  • 10 years ago
    Favourite answer

    but...come on, you are really over-analysizing things and thinking too much about events and people that are fleeting...in the grand scheme of things all this is just a gumdrop in the candy store of life...don't worry be happy, allow yourself to just be you and stay in the delight of the present...the potential for this day is up to you...make it grand!

    Source(s): life coach who can't spell
  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    The simple obvious answer is medicine

    Then theres the solution I gave myself one new years which was to be more outgoing. You read alot be friends with people who do the same. Book discussions are some of the best. You can compare ideas while doing simple activities. The fact that you read alot makes you really interesting. Assuming that your not reading about very boring subjects. Ive used books to answer these questions for me and I think they can do the same for you; read the art of seduction by robert greene. If you use it you will be very seductive and attractive to people. You already have friends so the hard part is done. What makes people closer is having intense or joyfull situations shared whatever they may be, secrets things like this. Maybe you need something to help you loosen up? I think its a more medical thing but those are my tips! Main point is share whats going on with you. Even this question or issue you have. Maybe they would also like to be closer to you. Goodluck

  • 10 years ago

    First, you're going to have to make up your mind. Either you do or don't want to work on this...you don't seem really sure. Have you spoken to whatever professional diagnosed you with 'maladaptive daydreaming'? Perhaps they can suggest some treatment.

  • 10 years ago

    it's human nature to want to fit in with other people...even just being around someone who acknowledges your presence and is ok with yours..um i'm pretty sure it's because you're sorta living in an extreme..in other words you can say you've liked summer so long now you long for winter..but once you have winter you realize you want summer...an other thing..um people like being comfortable..not a lot of people like walking out of their familiar home into the first day of class because it is unfamiliar terrain and thus uncomfortable :p you can even say that is why lots of people fear death..it's something unknown so it's scary :p haha death is uncomfortable :) i hope my very long explanation of what i think helped :)

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