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Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 10 years ago

Should I do this to kind of get back at him?

Last year for my boyfriend(of 1 year at that point)'s birthday(Dec.6) I bought him a nice euro style jacket for fall/winter that he can easily dress up or down and a years subscription to xbox live which cost about $100/110.

For my birthday (Dec.11) I got a toque and a scarf....now not a cute stylish toque and scarf made with nice materials, I'm talking about a plain white beanie and a long itchy oatmeal scarf that sheds which I can estimate was about $18 in total including tax since I saw those scarfs before and they're about $12 each

for christmas he tried a bit harder, it was a red purse, but to be honest it looks really cheap and it's not to my style other than the fact that 'it's red'

Valentines day I got up early, rushed back from grad dress shopping in the states, got dressed up, bought him two different kinds of chocolates($30) only to be greeted in sweat pants 'you really shouldn't wear that dress lol, we aren't doing anything but maybe watching a movie at my place' and then 'I thought we were doing stuff next weekend, I'll make you dinner'

---next weekend--

dressed up, go over excited

'Oh sorry I forgot and I have nothing prepared'.

my V day make up dinner was canned tuna on toast........

He still hasn't done anything for our 2yr anniversary even though he kept promising(it's over a month late and now I feel bad bothering him again about when he's going to take me out shopping/dinner since his dog just died)

but I seriously feel a lack of thought and effort on his part considering I take 2 months to figure out what he'd like and do it to the best of my abilities and all I get is one ugly beanie and broken promises :|

so in the hope that MAYBE he'll make up for something finally I got him a nice purple sweater and a nice scarf for about $40(I'm poor and have no job at the moment so I can't afford much else).

But because I'm still very bitter about the whole thing I figured I'd go to the thrift store and buy fake presents consisting of some plain old toque and an ugly scarf for him to un wrap and then give him his real present.

yes I'm pretty passive aggressive because he doesn't get subtle hints or obvious ones

Update:

it's not the cost that matters to me ;:| it's really just the thought that I care about and I could tell before our 1 year he was really thoughtful

now it just feels like I'm the only one doing things for the other person(I always make him food he likes, I bake him cookies, I give him massages, I change my plans last minute for him, I do a bunch of little things just for him, I do whatever I can so those plans don't change on my part. But he always changes things on me at the very last minute and a lot of the time it just sounds like an excuse)

seriously, I would cry out of joy if he did something small for no reason.

2 Answers

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  • 10 years ago

    that sounds childish. try talking to him instead of dropping hints, you might get through to him that way. If he still doesn't get it then you have to decide if you want to be with a guy that doesn't give gifts to your standards. But, if he is great in almost every other way then give him some slack.

    Edit: given the new info, sounds like he is taking you for granted. Stop being so agreeable & quit pampering him then see what happens.

    Source(s): dated a guy like this, he was a great guy just a crappy gift giver and I nitpicked our relationship to death because of it :(
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  • 10 years ago

    1. You sound like a deceitful woman that is obsessed with drama.

    2. Be grateful. it doesn't matter what how much the present costs.. it matters what he meant by it.

    3. Be straight forward with him, and stop playing games.

    No offense meant by any of this. Sorry if you didn't take it right.

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