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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Politics & GovernmentLaw Enforcement & Police · 1 decade ago

How can I drop domestic violence charges or lower them?

Hello, yesterday me and my now ex boyfriend got in our final fight. He got too violent and started threatening me and brought my 7 yr old son into the argument and basically threatened us with death. This is a complicated story. He became violent since about 2-3 weeks ago (threats, choking me, spitting on me, etc) He lived with me, BUT he did not want to be with me anymore.(since 2 weeks ago) He only wanted to stay with me and use me until he found a job. Of course, i wasn't okay with that you know cuz i still love him and couldn't process that he suddenly had changed his feelings towards me, so every time i would try to hug him or be next to him he would flip out and do those things he did to me.

I posted a post yesterday about him reading into conspiracies and occult symbolism and how ever since he got into that he changed toward me. U can read my story to better understand this one by following this link. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ai65p...

He is now in jail awaiting his court hearing and they are trying to charge him with two felonies PC273.5(A) and PC422. I told the police I did not want to file charges but they said they take domestic violence seriously now and will prosecute themselves. Is there any way I can talk 2 the DA or prosecutor or someone and have them give him a lighter sentence/charge such as a recommendation that he take counseling/anger management/ psychiatric help instead of facing possible prison time, since he has never been in trouble with the law before? What steps exactly do I need to take? All answers would be greatly appreciated! =] Thank you all so much.

Update:

he makes me feel bad because he said he could of left without me having to call the cops on him and ruin his life..

9 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favourite answer

    No, ma'am... your pleading for a 'light' sentence will be ignored.

    ANY man who hits or chokes a woman or threatens her child BELONGS IN PRISON.

    Many times, the female victim in these assaults tries to 'get back' with the offender and refuses to cooperate or testify. Because of that reason, the state will pick up the charge with or without the testimony of the victim, and he'll end up convicted.

    Source(s): DN4CER
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  • 1 decade ago

    Absolutely not. In a case like this you may notice it's the state of xyz -vs- your boyfriend. That's because the state is the plaintiff and you're just a witness. Also, why the heck would you lower the charge on someone who threatened your son??? You are making excuses for him because you're an enabler to him, sorry to say. Kiddo, you need to get away from him and get therapy before you get into any other relationships so you can avoid hooking up with another abuser. I wish you the best and take care of that baby. :)

    Source(s): degree in social work
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  • Todd B
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    Unfortunately, you do not have the option to get a domestic violence reduced or dropped. Usually, domestic assault charges are obtained by the officer investigating the occurrence, not the victim.

    The fact of the matter is, the domestic assault happened and whether you change your mind or make up with him or whatever, the charge has been made based on the probable cause of the incident. I wouldn't go to court and try to change your story or any facts of the event either. Else wise you could be charged with perjury.

    Source(s): Me - Police Officer
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  • JB
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Get away from him. Talk to a social worker at the women's self help center. He did something wrong and is making you think it is your fault, it is not. He has the problem. To threaten the person you supposedly love with death is a red flag that he has the problem.

    The fact that you want to help him shows the reason that the state will prosecute on your part. You don't see the danger with him, and the crime he committed. They will not lower the charges, nor should they. He belongs in jail and you need to talk to some one to see that you are the victim, not him.

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  • 1 decade ago

    You want to drop charges after he choked you? Any chance your brain was damaged by lack of oxygen?

    You could talk to the DA about reducing the charges, or file a victim impact statement with the court. Please do not do either, let the system work. He is leaving you, that means he is probably hooking up with someone else. Do the next girlfriend a favor ... let him sit in prison for a while! How would you feel if after you help him avoid serious prison time he chokes the life out of his next girlfriend?

    Men that abuse women and children deserve to be put in prison for the maximum time possible. I don't need to read beyond "he got too violent". It's not at all complicated ... he abused a woman and will go to prison for it, simple!

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  • 1 decade ago

    Walk away. You do not need to talk to the DA or prosecutor. The dirt bag committed a crime and should pay. If he isn't man enough to talk to the DA/prosecutor on his own behalf - he deserves to do time in jail.

    Walk away and never look back. What is the matter with you?

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  • Really
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    You no longer have anything to do with it, If it his first he might do jail time depends on what he did

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  • 1 decade ago

    Talk to him tell him to plead temporary insanity lol that always works.

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  • 1 decade ago

    please stop being in love with this guy

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