I was having a discussion with my friends last week, and they pretty much said that suicide was selfish -- I said it wasn't in all cases, as sometimes people cannot control their psychological emotions, and let them take over, and that leads to suicide. What you are feeling is not selfish in the least -- you're going through a tough time. It's understandable that you would feel like ending it all, especially when you have so many emotions, and, assuming that you're a teenager, you do not know exactly how to handle those emotions, and they can take over, whether or not you want them to. Also, it's hard to ask for help. I've had thoughts of suicide before. At the time, I was afraid to get the help that I needed, but finally got some help without actually informing my parents that I was having thoughts of suicide. The most important thing you need right now is to realize that there is a reason to live. Again, assuming you're a teenager, you just haven't found your reason quite yet. But that's normal for teenagers.
It sounds as though you do not want to discuss this with your parents, and, as far as I know, you need parental consent to go to therapy. You can ask your parents to go to therapy, but they might want to know why you want to go to therapy, which can lead to you having to tell your parents why you want to go. It sounds, to me, at least, that you don't want to tell your parents what is going on. So, my best suggestion as of now would be to call a suicide hotline. They're open twenty-four hours a day, and seven days a week, and they have people available that will help you with your problems, and will give you guidance. They are toll-free, and do not show up on phone bills. Below, I have posted two national suicide hotlines in the United States.
Since I do not know exactly what is causing these feelings, I have decided to list a few United States gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth in the United States.
One if the Trevor Project. The Trevor Project operates the nations only 24/7 crisis & suicide prevention helpline for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and questioning youth. If you or a friend are feeling lost or alone call The Trevor Helpline. There is hope, there is help.
If you are not from the United States, then you may want to look at this website I found, which lists different international hotlines, and different international centers, located in different countries. If you live in the United Kingdom, you may want to call "The Samaritans". They have lines in Ireland, Scotland, Wales and England. "The Samaritans" is for not only teenagers, but for people of all ages who just need someone to talk to.
United Kingdom: 08457 90 90 90
Republic of Ireland: 1850 60 90 90
Also, depending on where you live, I have listed some other suicide hotlines I have found, country granting. Since I do not know where you live, as you very well may live outside of the United States and the United Kingdom or the Republic of Ireland, I will list a few suicide hotlines that you may want to check out.
01 45 39 40 00
1300 13 11 14
5222-999 within Auckland
0800 111-777 outside Auckland
02 649 95 55
111 0 333 (for kids/teens)
Here, you may be able to find some suicide hotlines in various countries, dependant on where you live. The site has phone numbers to national suicide hotlines in many European countries, and has links to many sites where you may be able to find phone numbers to suicide hotlines in whatever country in which you live:
You might also suggest talking to a guidance counselor at school. He or she will not inform your parents of anything that goes on inside the room, just like with professional therapists, and, again, like professional therapists, he or she will ONLY tell your parents what has gone on in the room if he or she fears for your safety, or the safety of someone else. I think that talking to a guidance counselor is the best option for you right now, as he or she will help you tell your parents -- it's better to do it with someone there, then to do it by yourself. It's less intimidating, and you can have someone to back you up if your parents get angry, or if they question your motives, which -- let's face it -- is likely to happen when and if you tell your parents.
Do not hesitate to e-mail me if you ever need or want help -- I am going through a somewhat similar situation, although to a lesser extent, right now, and I will gladly help you in any thing that you need, regardless of whether or not I am not as educated as the next guy. If you need to let something out, and get something off of your chest, e-mail me whenever you want or need.
All the best ♥
· 10 years ago