Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingParenting · 1 decade ago

Does being a single parent feel more emotionally trying pending the circumstances of how that it happened?

I think a widow has intense feelings of guilt, sadness, and nostalgia of missing their mate while caring for their children or child wishing they had an extra pair of hands to help out with the diapers and the feeding. I think a fornicator who never established a legal documented married relationship with anybody pending the age either feels anger of being used and dirty or overwhelmed because their school days of having fun and doing homework having turned into rushed days of feeding and consoling a crying baby when they would much rather be out at the mall or going to the movies with their friends. The attention turns from fashion passion to baby mama drama so you turn in that skirt or that basketball jersey for a pair of size 2 shoes. If the parent is divorced regardless of age I think the feeling is a sense of regret that not enough effort was made to be forgiving and make the marriage relationship work effectively. Divorce is basically a break-up between people who are legally documented to live together in the same house as husband and wife so of course money for child support and grievances/emotional damages will be involved whereas if the couple wasn't married it would be all on the mom and there would be no legal pinning for the father because he's not legally bound to the lady by marriage (shared property, income, visitation rights, etcetera). I just think the emotional feelings for a single mother or father on their own pending their focus at a certain point in life (school student or home owner) and how that single & a baby life came about (widowhood, fornication & breakup, divorce) has different impacts on the people involved and go a long way to determining how well the child knew the missing parent (if they ever talked/played together vs. if the parent died or abandoned the family while the child was still an infant). Keep in mind emotions too. A 20 year old woman who is upset because her boyfriend is leaving her would be going though just as much heartbreak likely as an elderly 73 year old woman whose husband is dying (or already died) of cancer in the hospital. The feeling of loss is the same no matter how different the specific circumstances or where the person was in the stream of time in his or her life whether a working mom, a retired widow, or a scared student (whether conception occurred while in junior high, high school, or college).

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  • LR
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago
    Best answer

    I was widowed in my early 30's with a young child and I regularly work with people going through divorce. The impact can be very different for people in the same position (ie, two people getting divorced at about the same age with the same number and age of children) depending on personal factors such as how they perceived their marriage, family support, personal strength, etc. The pain may be as great in the circumstances you describe and yet be different. Often a person whose loved one has been suffering for a long time reaches a point that they hope (and even pray) for the person to die and so have the suffering to end. This does not mean the pain is not great at their loss; it just means they have a different reaction to it than the person who loses someone unexpectedly. Pain and loss are very individual and I truly believe that no one can truly know another's pain and loss, even when the other person has experienced a similar loss.

  • 1 decade ago

    "I think a fornicator who never established a legal documented married relationship with anybody pending the age either feels anger of being used and dirty or overwhelmed because their school days of having fun and doing homework having turned into rushed days of feeding and consoling a crying baby when they would much rather be out at the mall or going to the movies with their friends. The attention turns from fashion passion to baby mama drama so you turn in that skirt or that basketball jersey for a pair of size 2 shoes."

    Well, that's my category. But... Since I was 29 when I had my son... My school days of having fun and doing homework were already LONG gone.

    Thanks for playing, try again next time.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think that parents, single or otherwise, have complicated situations that are unlikely to fall neatly into those kinds of broad categorizations. But person's very specific circumstance (not just general situation) doubtless does influence their experience of parenting.

    A father is legally liable to support his child whether or not he's ever been married.

    Source(s): seriously, a "fornicator"? not the most neutral description....
  • 1 decade ago

    Being a single parent can be emotionally trying regardless of your situation.

    There are too many situations and factors concerning them to even list, so to try to compare emotional impact is impossible and unfair

    Source(s): <<--- Single mommy who doesn't fit into any of your descriptions
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  • 1 decade ago

    since i'm probably going to do the single mom thing yet again for a third time at the age of 42 and having had a brief taste of being part of a pair of parents, i can unequivocally state:

    single parenting is WAY the freak easier!

    i simply cannot deal with being undermined and circumvented all the time. ie, i say "no candy" so he - literally! - rushes out to buy chocolate; i say "bedtime", he says "oh, come on, it's still early!" (yes, but *I* am exhausted!). he says things like "oh, i'd give this to you but your mom says you can't have it".

    definitely easier being a single parent.

  • AmberP
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    Honestly it depends on the person and how they handle things. Not all people would react in the way that you are saying, but at the same time some would!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I see what your saying... I guess it truly depends on the person and how they deal with the situation. Truly depends on that in my opinion.

  • avi
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    I was a single mom but, sorry, I don't relate at all to what you wrote. Nice try.

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