How to tell your parents REALLY bad news?!!?

So Im not sure where to begin, but basically I have to drop a lot of bad news on my parents at once: The first thing is that on halloween, (couple weeks ago) I got alcohol poisoning and I ended up spending the entire weekend in the hospital getting treated. I wasn't even planning on telling them about it....until I got my $1550.42 hospital bill in the mail. There's no way I can pay for it, because I just got fired from my job, which was just part time anyways. Oh but that's not all. When I said that I don't tell them much about whats going on in my life, I forgot to mention I often lie to them to keep them off my back as well. The other thing I have to tell them is that not only am I on probation from school this semester, but I might be suspended from next semester also, b/c Im not doing very well in my classes. They don't know that I'm on probation in the first place though...I told them I passed all my classes last semester. Im not particularly close to my parents and don't tell them much about whats going on in my life and my problems, which makes it so much harder to tell them bad news. Im sooo scared to tell them all this, and I have to either tell them over the phone or by e-mail because I'm away at college....should I phone or e-mail? and where do I even begin? Please help?!

Update:

pshhh paragraphs are overrated....

16 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Best answer

    Wow ...............

    I think you need to visit your parents. Sit down with them and tell them the truth about what has been going on in your life. Telling them by telephone or email is a cowardly way. Also, if you are expecting them to pay for your hospital bill it is time you grew up and accepted some responsibility for your actions. You got alcohol poisoning because you drank too much. Why should they have to bail you out. Take control of your life, sounds like you are totally out of control. Lies, lies, lies .... Why? There is obviously something missing from your life for you to be in such dire straits with alcohol, school, etc. Please talk to your parents, be totally honest with them, if you have a problem talk to them about it. If you confide in them maybe your relationship will take on a new meaning. Good Luck.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    If you're not in school this semester, can you try to find another part time job and work more hours a week? That way, you can at least have SOME money saved up and cut the bill in half.

    Have some mature solutions to tell them. For example, consider switching to a local community college, getting a job, and paying for the classes yourself. That way, you will have a chance to prove that you really care about school.

    I agree with telling them on the phone. Email can be taken out of context. Emotions are not conveyed accurately when people read emails. You might mean to sound sorry in the email that you send, but you parents may imagine a different tone when reading it, lol. So, sound sorry and present mature solutions while telling your parents over the phone.

  • 1 decade ago

    Wow...that is a lot to put out there all at once so just take one thing at a time;

    First, the alcohol poisoning:You have to tell them, there's no getting around that. Fortunately, they will probably be more worried/ glad you are safe now than mad. You can't pay the bill and you need help. Don't be too afraid, just get it over with. Be humble and appologetic, I would suggest over the phone...

    Second, depending on whether or not you're on probation or flat out got kicked out for a semester, they'll probably want to pull you out...that is worst case scenario but hey...life has consequences. Don't tell them about being fired yet...too much to handle for right now.

    Understand that you are accountable for your actions, you made a mistake that's fine you're human...but now you have to fix them so work towards that.

    Please know that this WILL pass...I've gone through much worse and have come out the other side.

    Peace and love to you.

  • 1 decade ago

    First of all, your parents are not responsible for your medical bill. Just send them $10-$20 per month until it is paid. Medical bills are the only ones that will allow you to do that, because they are not anticipated bills. You will never have to tell your parents.

    As far as probation, you had better quit drinking and start studying. There is no excuse for your parents to put that much money out, for you to get a good education and a good future, and you blow it, like an idiot. You can't imagine how man kids have parents that can not afford to send them to school When they finish they end up have to pay $300-$500 a month back to the government for their student loans. You had better take advantage of the privilege you have been given!!! Stop the foolishness and start studying. You are not a child any longer!!!!

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    WOW that really does suck especially around the holidays. But I would just tell them after the holidays. But you most likely won't have to pay for that hospital bill cause your probably still on your parents insurence. So thats one down and the other well just study harder when you get back to school.

    Just come out with it over the phone. Maybe have a few drinks before you call to be more relaxed and tell them that you didn't know what to do and that you turned to them since you know that they love you and would guild you in the better direction.

  • 1 decade ago

    For starters, you really should be closer to your parents. They raised you. They're not there simply to bail you out whenever your in trouble, they're their to care about you and you should care about them enough to tell them the truth about your life on daily basis. You don't have to lie, just omit certain truths.

    As far as the hospital bill goes, talk to the hospital administrator about a payment plan you can arrange. Seeing as how you don't have a job, and I'm guessing no medical insurance, you can arrange a payment plan as low as $50 per month, sometimes lower depending on how well you present your case to the hospital. See about doing that first before resorting to telling your parents.

    As for school, talk to the guidance counselor about methods of improving your grades. Present yourself in a sensible manner as someone truly struggling and try to negotiate a means to be removed from probation, or at least not be suspended next semester.

    After seeing what you can do with the hospital and school, go ahead and go SEE your parents. Not phone call. Not email. Visit. Explain to them your stressed with your job and it affected your school work. Tell them you've felt emotionally distant from them but you don't want to be that sort of person and, hopefully, demonstrate that you've been able to handle yourself with school and the hospital. If those things don't pan out, you'll have to throw yourself at their mercy with the promise to do better.

    Do your best and don't make anymore mistakes like that and you should be fine.

  • 1 decade ago

    1st-pray about it. God never gives you more than you can handle. Trust me, when I was in college I had an issue that involved finances and after praying about it a solution presented itself.

    2nd-If you absolutely can not talk to them in person (which I think is the best way to tell them) then give them a call and tell them that you have something important to tell them but you can not talk at the moment so you are going to email them about it. Have the email ready to go with a game plan on how you can work on paying off the medical bill or at least can pay them back for it. Also, a game plan on how to get yourself back on track at school. You may also want to come up with a plan on how to not let yourself get back in that situation again (alcohol poisioning). Then shoot them the email and give them some time to process the news. When you are ready, call them back and do not get defensive when they give you their imput. Remember they are your parents and they wan the best for you. So they may get very upset with you at first but you guys will get through it.

    Take it one day a time for now.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You should call them emails not appropriate not with this sort of news. You can email them to say that you have bad news and that you need to speak with them so that they know what to expect. You will just have to work up the nerve to call them whats the worst that could happen? But if you could avoid telling them and still get by you should this is what I would do to avoid upseting them, you are on your own now they cant bail you out forever. and you can always pay the hospital bill later. they take payments

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    First of all, call the hospital and tell them about your job situation. They should work with you on payments, and you might even be able to avoid paying altogether if you can't afford to. You may not even have to tell your parents about that. As for the rest of that stuff, either tell them or let them figure it out on their own. I'd say e-mail would be a good way to break it to them because that way they HAVE to listen to your side of the story without interrupting you. Good luck.

  • 1 decade ago

    sucks to be you, cause the first thing is taht lies lead to more lies!!! and it dosent matter to make a whole train of lies until you hit a big one(in your case this one) that you cant get through. um...all i can tell you is to tell the truth, on phone. it has to be as mostly in person as possible. in person is the ebst to my opinion, but since ur away at college i guess phone. In person would also be best cause you cna get someone to side with u....a freind...idk...a coubcler...anything, but as long as that person helps calm the situation a bit by backing you up

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