Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 decade ago

Do you ever wonder where you're going wrong?

After recently breaking up with my boyfriend, and looking around at couples over the weekend, I feel a bit miserable this morning and wonder - where am I going wrong!!? I dont think Im bad looking, have a good job - quite independant and am very loyal and faithful! I just cant see why I have such trouble attracting decent guys!! I have a load of casual no strings attached offers from guys- no - I dont go looking for this, but I think that because Ive big boobs guy assume things! But whats actually wrong with me to say I cant find a decent guy looking for a relationship!!?

Its getting me down!!


ok - Im not ignoring the nice guys, I have tried a variety of places to meet guys - pubs/clubs/through friends/you name it!!

Update 2:

jason K - Im 31

15 Answers

  • Favourite answer

    In My Personal Opinion you are a Cracker ! You have got so many Highly A+ttractive & very Desirable Mental & Physical Qualities ! Keep Smiling ! Always look on the BRIGHT side of Life (Monty Python's 'Life of Brian' Film) ! Keep the Positive Mental Attitude (PMA) ! You have the right A+ttitude ! LOVE will find you when you are least expecting it to ! You give out GOOD ADVICE ! Take Care & Best Wishes !

  • "But whats actually wrong with me to say I cant find a decent guy looking for a relationship!!?"

    There's you're problem right there. You are searching too hard. When we are looking for someone else "to complete us," it oftens has the opposite affect and gives us an aura of "neediness" that is repulsive to the opposite sex. Think of all the loser, desperate guys you meet...they all have that neediness that you can detect within the first 3 seconds that is an instant turnoff for you.

    Here's the solution, have a life! Sign up for some meetup groups, go to the gym, stay busy all the time. Not only will it allow you to meet more interesting people with like interests, it will also occupy your concious mind so you are not thinking about your love life so much. I just signed up for salsa lessons, muay thai class, and Italian classes myself.

    I don't know if you read the book "the secret" at all, but I found something very interesting in it pertaining to attracting the things you want in your life. When you think "I can't be late for work," chances are you will be late because you are concentrated on being LATE. Negating being late doesn't work, you have to think "I am going to be ON TIME," not "I can't be LATE for work."

    I want you to change your thinking from "Why can't I attract a decent guy," to "why hasn't a decent guy found me yet?" Do you see how that thought puts you in a more powerful position? You are a woman and have your veritable "pick" from the gene pool for a potential mate, remember that.

    As for your big boobs, sorry but I'm more of an *** guy ;O)

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I know, I feel exactly the same way!

    I have big boobs too, and people are always commenting on them. It's like... geez get over it, they're bags of fat hanging off of someone's chest -_-

    People know that I've had a lot of sex in the past... and for some reason, this makes them think that I'm a dirty whore, who's going to cheat on any boyfriend I get! Sometimes I think that is where I go wrong.. my last boyfriend, whom I still love deeply, broke up with me because of "trust issues". He said it was because of previous girlfriends, but I knew very well it's because I have had sex before, and he hasn't.

    It sucks so bad, I know exactly where you're coming from! I think it's just a matter of patience and time... it hurts, but when the perfect man for us is ready, they'll come.


  • 1 decade ago

    Sometimes when you are faithful and loyal, some take that as a weakness, and it is truly a strength to be that kind of person. Most of us are attracted to a certain type of guy, and are not willing to try the other type of guy, usually someone you are unattracted to. Maybe you should go against the grain, date a different type of man and see what happens. When you are not looking that's when you will find one and i hope it is great.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Maybe try looking in a different area? Take up a hobby or something along those lines? There is probably a guy just perfect for you thinking the same thing as you. Just be patient, You'll cross paths when the time is right.

  • 1 decade ago

    Ur goal would to get married?..Well if u want a marriage that's going 2 last ur doing exactly what u need 2 do, by now uve figured out that there are more jackazzs than good guys, just keep datin, eliminating, being urself and sticking 2 ur guns...

  • 1 decade ago

    It's because nice guys don't feel they should have to go out of their way to get your attention, already putting enough effort into being nice... Girls are generally so inundated by offers (casual and otherwise) that they dismiss, well but the most conspicuous.

    Best advice is don't limit your options to people that approach you. Choose & approach guys yourself, even if you don't know much about them. Your intuition is prolly more accurate than you give it credit for.

    ps. how old r u? :)

  • I'm sure that there isn't anything wrong w/ you.

    Maybe you need to stop focusing on trying to attract people, and don't go looking for a relationship. I know that it may not seem possible, but the nice guys who are worthy of a good woman usually emerge when you are not pining for a relationship.

    You say that you are independent, so go about your business and enjoy your life. Put yourself -not a guy or whether or not you get a good guy- first for now. Don't let not being in a relationship bum you out. Pretend that you are Carrie from Sex and the City -despite the few bizarre relationships she gets herself into, she's still a happy free-spirit whether w/ or w/out a man. Have girls' nights out, and rather than being on the lookout for a guy, focus on your friends and you, and the fun you have w/out guys (believe it or not, it does exist). Unfortunately, it's a proven fact that women are more vulnerable to getting into bad relationships when they think that they are the ones who are "going wrong." -Don't get so down on yourself that you let that happen. -I am not trying to say that you definitely will, but more often than not, it does happen.

    If guys are only attracted to your boobs then it is their loss -not yours. A good guy for you is out there somewhere, but let him find you and prove himself worthy of you. When I met my hubby, I wasn't even looking for a man, he just happened to find me, and we remained only friends for a long time, until I thought that he was worthy of me. I had no idea that he would one day be my husband when I met him.

    Hang in there lady, a good guy will find you, but until then, live it up and don't let being single bring you down!

  • 4 years ago

    No....I would never be capable of killing anyone, unless they killed someone I loved or something like that. Otherwise, I think it's enough to IMAGINE doing the deed.

  • 1 decade ago

    he will come along just be paitent maybe some guys are too scared of you and you look unaproachable because u are too goodlooking or something maybe they think they dont stand a chance with you so they dont bother

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