Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 decade ago

Mother passed away?

My mother passed away ova a yr ago and its bn hard.. I looked afta her for 15 yrs.. bc she had a stroke n couldnt talk n walk.... its so hard witout her... she wsnt jus my mother but she ws my bestfwend... im feelin so lost....

Update:

Thank u to everyone who responded to me. It does help to kno that I am not alone...

19 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Hi there,

    First, I want to say I am so sorry for your loss. Please try to take comfort in the fact that you did such a wonderful thing for your mother by looking after her for so many years. What a good "child" you were/are.

    My best friend's mother passed away when my friend was only 22. It was very sudden too. She was diagnosed too late with liver cancer and it had already spread. So from diagnoses to her passing was a very short time.

    It really sent my friend into a tailspin. Now, over six years later she is finally pulling things together. Unfortunately she did not have the strongest support system. I tried, but she needed someone to guide her, and I wasn't old enough to do that.

    My husband lost his mom just after we were married, and he was 25. Cancer again. :( He misses her dearly, but he had me for a strong support system.

    Turn to loved ones. Turn to faith. Maybe seek out a counsellor to talk to if you feel it might help. Make a change in your life. Join groups. Be active. Keep your mind occupied with positive things in your life. It wont take away the hurt and loss, but it might help you feel more connected and less lost.

    I wish you all the best. Your mom was so lucky to have you to love and care for her. I would do this for my mom, and I hope I raise a daughter that loved me this much too.

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  • 1 decade ago

    This is a subject that is very near and dear to my heart. I lost my mother in 1990 and it is now 2007 and there is stilll a big hole in my life and heart. When you lose your mother, like you said, you lose your best friend. Your mother nurtured you, gave birth to you, and was there whenever you needed her.

    I also took care of my mother towards the end, I look back now and think of how special those times were. I am very proud that I did all I could for her and I know she was thankful, even if she didn't say it all the time.

    You will never get over it, no matter what other people say, I am 45 yrs old and miss her everyday and ya know sometimes, it may seem weird, but I ask her things and talk to her, and I feel better.

    I am very proud of you for doing the best you could and I am sure your mother is watching over you, her angel, and giving you strength to live day by day.

    She will always love you and you her, that is the special bond between a mother and a daughter, that never ends.

    Hang in there, you have all my sympathy and best wishes.

    Let the tears roll, when they don't, there is a problem.

    Take Care.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Honey:

    God is watching over you. Your Mother wants you to move on. There are some wonderful self help books at the Library or books store in reference to moving on and letting go. It is ok to mourn but you must move forward in order to heal. Take a retreat if you can. Meditation is a wonderful way to relax and unwind. Treat yourself to a spa. There you can get a message and some well over due pampering while you are reading some wonderful self help material. There are group therapy sessions that can also help you. Talk to your doctor about this. You are suffering from mild depression it is only natural because of the love and care you gave Mom.

    Prayer worked wonders for me.

    God Bless You and grant you peace

    Source(s): I have been a club member since I was 11 I am now 47 It does get easier in time.
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  • ajal
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    i know what you are going through, i lost my dad when he was 39 the same age i am now ,he suffered a severe stroke and died within a couple of days, i was a minor and neer had the change to say goodbye, there is no grave, nonone remembers what ve happened to his Remains/Ashes and taht saddens me the most.For you mom its best to have gone to a place with eternal peace she must have been severely handicapped and with some awareness that must have been devastated for her.We want to remember the person the way he/she was as our parent full of life,strong etc but in fact in a way another person ve died with the stroke the person/parent also died what was left behind was a living tragedy ,pain unbearable a life almost not worth living so when our parent finally met their MAKER it was for the best

    ofcourse i miss my dad every day i would give everyting to hear his voice its more then 30 years ago but the hurt will never go away but give it a place and have your peace with it.Your mom would have wanted for you to be happy and life your life to the fuest as you know you never know when it will end and espec on her Anniversary or Birthday you may feel sad. allow that.

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  • 1 decade ago

    And is going to be hard, my mom passed away several years ago from cancer, and yes I still miss her. Is it going to get easier? So days it is some days you will think of her and smile without feeling the pain, and other days You will feel lost. But I feel if you talk about her, it doesn't hurt as much because she is still apart of you, she is still with you. I know this is not much comfortable, but that's what helped me. Don't keep your feelings insided keep her memory alive by talking about her and what a wonderful person she was, it may ease the pain a bit. May God be with you in your time of need.

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  • lynda
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    I am so sorry for you lost. I too lost my mom and since that day I feel like I am severed from the main root of my life.. I know though my mom would not want me to sit here and feel sad for her, because she is in a much better world now, than I. I think of good times with my parents, and I know they are with me always, and it's comforting. You might need to seek some help to deal with your grief.Talk about her share you memeories and in time it will get better. I lost both of my parents 16 years ago and not a day goes by I don't miss them. Good luck...

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  • 1 decade ago

    I know how it feels I didn't think I was going to live without mine. It is still hard it's been a few years but it does get better. Try to think of the happy times with them and continue to enjoy and excel at things that you enjoyed together. Hope it gets better. Have a good day.

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  • 1 decade ago

    it is a natural feeling to miss and find it difficult to move on when you lose someone dear to you ...such as a mother. however i am sure she would not want you.. to put your life on hold because of her death. a real mother such as yours..would want you to be happy and successful. so for moms sake... enjoy the rest of your life. remember death is inevitable. we will all die..that is the way it goes. but you are still alive. so honor your mom..by being the best that you can be. it is not healthy to dwell sooo long... of course you miss..and love... but the time has come for you to save the memories and discard.. the depression.

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  • 4 years ago

    That's very sad. May she forever Rest In Peace.

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  • guRl
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Don't worry you will overcome it in due time, what matter is that you will have a good life, I'm sure that will make your Mom happy from a distance. I think you need to divert attention to other matters maybe having a sport will do...

    Smile, life is good.

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